It's time again to break out your Cher Twitter translator, Instincters.
The cherished gay icon spent the early morning hours defending herself to hordes of Twitterers after praising anti-gay TV preacher Joel Osteen for making "Every1 feel welcome to his church no matter who they are."
"I love Joel Osteen, he's an example of Christian," tweeted Cher. "I know this sounds crazy coming from me, but he's cool, upbeat, wants you to have fun, he's funny and not preachy!"
Cher's followers then reminded her that, uh, his touting of homophobia isn't very funny and might actually constitute as preachy.
Osteen doesn't shy away from his anti-gay platform (though he does employ the "I'm homophobic but I'm not a homophobe" reasoning we see all too often). He's against any recognition of gay couples, considers homosexuality is a sin, and believes gay people can change their orientation because THE BIBLE!
Here's one of Osteen's best hits from an interview last year with Piers Morgan:
Yes, I've always believed, Pierce, that scripture shows that it's a sin. But I'm not one of those that are out there to bash homosexuals and tell them that they're terrible people....
''I don't believe homosexuality is God's best for a person's life. I mean, sin means 'to miss the mark.' ... I think I'm growing in my knowledge. I mean, those first interviews -- this is all new to me. I didn't go to seminary....
''People say I don't talk about sin, but I do talk about how we live our life, and making good choices....
''I think [civil partnerships] is wrong, but I'm not going to bash those people. I'm not going to be against those people. They're good people. I say it's wrong because that's what the scripture says....
''I'm not the judge. God didn't tell me to go around judging everybody.... I don't know that God is judging sins on different levels. But we pick out that one.... If you listen to our message, they're about lifting people up. So it's not -- I mean, I really talk about that homosexuality when we get on the interviews....
''I believe God can give us grace to change. We've seen people break addictions, and do other things as well.'
So, fans reminded/enlightened Cher to the fact that Osteen is a bigot and she, understandably, put up the defense shields. "But I'M NOT. Proved this MY WHOLE LIFE. We have a BOND. Christians have a hard time but we can change this."
Cher goes on for four tweets about her love for the gays before finally threatening to leave Twitter if the endorsement cost her any gay fans.
"But gay pple have stayed w/me through 40 yrs when every1 else left! If i broke our bond & u hav no love 4 me anymore this is my last txt."
Cher spent more time praising the gay community after learning of Osteen's homophobia than she did praising Osteen, so people should go easy on the big C. We all make mistakes. Plus, what else will we do when we get home from the bar at 3 a.m. with the blurred vision and disorientation that makes it actually easier to read her tweets?! Sleep?? Blah.
(Source: Cher's Twitter)