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 SOAPBOX - KEVIN SMITH gets the last word
The film director and writer gives us his gay View Askew
Growing up, I didn’t know any gay people…though obviously I’ve known my brother Don my whole life, and he’s gay. I don’t think it was him hitting a turning point at a certain age. I believe that’s who you are from the jump. It’s genetic. You come out liking what you like.
I remember my mother telling me about Don. There was two seconds where I was like, “What?” And then immediately, “That makes absolute sense! That’s why at nine at night Don and some dude were sitting on a couch watching some movie together.” That’s not to say I have never hung out with my friends and watched a movie at 9 at night, but not with the proximity they had to each other on the couch—and they were both well-dressed.
There was a two- or three-month period where Don didn’t know I knew, and I kept waiting for him to address it with me. He was driving me to film school, and it was about a two hour ride, and we’re talking about everything in the world except that. I see the skyline in the distance and I’m like, Fuck it, it’s now or never: “So I understand you have an alternative lifestyle.”
Don starts cracking up, but said it’s true. I was like, “Dude, why didn’t you tell me? Did you think I would be mad or grossed out? I feel really insulted that you have this view of me that I would react in some small-minded way.” But then we spent the rest of the trip talking about it. It was a predecessor to that scene in Chasing Amy where Banky is asking Alyssa all these questions about what it’s like being a lesbian.
I recently did a cover story with my good friend Malcolm Ingram for A Bear’s Life magazine since I produced his doc Small Town Gay Bar. The reaction, at least in the gay press, has been very favorable. I got called a douche bag on some website, though, with no reason given, but I get that kind of reaction in the straight community, too.
The producers of Late Show With David Letterman decided they wanted to talk to me about it when I was on. I’m really happy for Steve, the dude who runs that magazine. Letterman held it up for 28 seconds! He held it up so fucking long, and we were talking, and all you could see was a close-up of the magazine. Steve was talking about how difficult it is to get advertising for the magazine, because unlike Out or The Advocate, it’s not filled with pretty, hot young things. A Bear’s Life is full of…well, guys like me.
Some people have asked what it’s like to be a gay icon, at least for the moment. It’s so ironic, and it’s flattering, but I’m so not what turns anybody on…normally. But apparently there are a few out there who like a guy who looks like me. No, I didn’t have photos taken with me wearing leather chaps or studs or anything like that. But if the magazine makes it 10 years, that’ll be the 10-year-anniversary cover.
When The Advocate ran an interview with Brett Ratner and Brett admitted he got his first blow job from a dude that Brett thought was a woman, a friend of mine said I’d been “out-gayed.” Someone on the View Askew website said that proved Brett was a hack director, because anybody who gets a blow job from somebody, and doesn’t know it’s a guy until it’s over, clearly doesn’t have an eye for detail and shouldn’t be a director. I say give the dude massive props for telling that story! Talk about just handing ammo over to people to fire at you.
My Boring-Ass Life is basically a printed version of the blog that I write online. When they approached me about turning the material into a book, I said, “Why, when you can read it for free online?” They said, “Not everyone has a computer,” but I refuse to believe that. So when I asked if I had to do anything for it and they said I didn’t, I said okay.
After Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back came out, some folks—including the media relations director of GLAAD at that point, circa 2001—went after me and the movie, maintaining it was homophobic and gay-bashing. It’s kind of mind-bending. As I said then and have ever since, there’s a scene in the movie where one of the lead characters cops to the fact that he would suck the dick of the other lead character. I mean, it doesn’t get any gayer than that.
I’ve said in many an interview, from Chasing Amy onward, that the only reason I never dabbled in homosexuality when I was younger was because I wouldn’t know what to say to a guy after he blew a load in my mouth—a sentiment that says more about my social awkwardness than any socially awkward stereotypes that have been unfairly hung on the gay community. To ask if my view of gays has changed since finding out Don was gay would be predicated on me having a view at any point that was negative; I just never did.
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Pick up My Boring-Ass Life (Titan Books) and check out Kevin online at viewaskew.com!
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Instinct Online 
written by Jason on December 02, 2007
I'm just as baffled as Kevin is as to how he is a sex symbol. I think it's great that he is comfortable with his sexuality and can talk honestly about gay issues when it could alienate some of his straight fan base.