Jonathan Higbee's picture

Sherri Shepherd To Gays: I Don't Agree With Your Lifestyle, But I Love You

When asked what she feels is the biggest public misconception about her, The View's Sherri Shepherd nominated her reputation as being anti-gay. Sherri then goes on the defense in the new interview with Fusion's Alicia Menendez, and claims that though she doesn't agree with the "gay lifestyle" (whatever that means), she loves us. 

She explains: 

I think people don't know my heart. I think people feel I'm very judgmental. I think people feel I'm very homophobic. If they knew me, and knew my heart. You grow up being a Christian and you grow up believing homosexuality is a sin; you're going to hell if you're a homosexual. This is something that they teach in churches. So it's something that I grew up believing.

...

I might not agree with your lifestyle, but I love you. You may not agree with my lifestyle, but you love me. I don't say it's a choice. If you tell me, 'Sherri, I was born gay.' OK. I'm not gonna argue with you, because I can't tell you how you feel and what's going on inside. I'm trying to make it into heaven by the skin of my teeth. I don't know who I'm gonna see. So if you tell me you're born [gay], I'm not gonna argue with you. And I absolutely respect you for that. I just ask that people respect how I feel, [I] respect how you feel and we can have a great dialog.

Given her new interview, do you think Sherri's reputation as anti-gay is a misconception?

 

 

Comments

Like Judas they portray us with a kiss...I don't accept that kind of love.

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Elis--First I never stated I was or was not gay. That is an assumption you chose to make simply because my post was in support of gay individuals. Second, I have a very clear understanding of the Bible and too was raised in a church. My point (that was obviously missed) there are far too many religious/religions using said religion in order to EXCLUDE entire groups of people. If you don't believe that you are ignorant, uneducated, naive, or just plain stupid. Walk into any number of churches in this country -state you are gay-and see how many accept and welcome you. Far too few. My post had nothing to do with forgiveness-I have nothing to forgive Ms. Shepard for. I simply believe (based on her own words) that she is in fact a bigot -but that because she is using her religion as a defense, that somehow makes it ok. This defense by reason of religion is far too common in today's churches-places I was raised to believe should be open and accepting of all.

What I am is not a "lifestyle". How would she feel if i said I don't agree with her "Black Lifestyle?" She may act all white and republican but as long as she goes around in public flaunting her beautiful dark skin coloring I just can't approve of her. Hmmm, how does that not outrage you, Sherri?

I THINK PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT THEIR WILL ALWAYS BE A HUGE DEBATE OVER THIS, BUT HE WHO LIVE IN GLASS HOUSES SHOULDN'T THROW STONES!! BECAUSE JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE  A STRAIGHT PERSON, DOES NOT GIVE YOU FREE REIGN TO DO WHATEVER , WITH WHOMEVER  HOW OFTEN YOU FEEL IS NECESSARY! EVERYBODY HAS SKELETONS IN THEIR CLOSET! AND PEOPLE AS YOU KNOW HAS AND WILL ALWAYS INTREPID THE BIBLE TO SOOTH THEIR OWN NEEDS!! AND TRY TO USE THAT TO SHAME AND DEGRADE OR MAKE OTHERS FEEL LESS THAN!! BUT GOD GIVES US ALL FREE WILL! COME AS YOU ARE! OK! MOST FOLKS FANTASIES ABOUT BEING WITH TWO WOMEN, AND SOMEHOW THAT IS EXCEPTED, BUT ANY OTHER FORM OF FREE CONSENSUAL LOVE OR EXPRESSION OF SUCH LOVE IS AN ABOMINATION!! I DON'T GET THAT!! BUT THAT IS THE HUMAN PHYSIC!! I AM A FIRM BELIEVER OF" SEEK YE AN UNDERSTANDING " FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR HIGHER POWER! IS VERY PERSONAL AND IT BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR HIGHER POWER! BESIDES NO ONE CAN GET YOU INTO HEAVEN EXCEPT YOU AND WE ARE JUDGED INDIVIDUALLY ON OUR DEEDS AND ACTIONS NOT BY OUR WORDS! SO I GUESS WHAT I'M SAYING IS BE THE BEST YOU, YOU CAN BE AND THE REST WILL WORK ITSELF OUT DON'T ALLOW OTHERS OPINIONS AND JUDGMENTS DEFINE WHO YOU ARE!  OR YOUR SELF WORTH! SIMPLY LET GO AND LET GOD! I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE!!

She absolutely has the right to her opinions

being as she is a paid public figure..we absolutely have a right to oppose those opinions whether through boycott,trying to have her removed from a position wherein her opinion can be used to influence others,or expressing our opinions of her belief system..dont hate,mobolize..contact her employers and let them know this shrews views r unacceptable in YOUR nation!

Everyone should read the book "Zealot". This book tells just how distorted the bible really is. Zealot tells just how ruthless all of the Christians were and their desire to gain power over others. This is the way organized Christianity is today. Power and hatred. Its hasn't changed from olden days.

Sherri Shepherd can live her life the way she sees fit based on her upbringing and choices.  However, being in the public eye and expounding on her agreeing or not agreeing with the gay lifestyle is another subject entirely.  She is a public figure and should keep her personal beliefs and politics to herself.  Expounding on this subject mean giving her opinion...she doesn't get a get out of jail free card because she loves everyone.  With choices come responsibilities and come consequences some good and some bad.  So Sherri if your listening, you should have kept your anti-gay comments to yourself because no amount of being PC is going to get you out of this one and you have judged us so now you will be judged on that choice.  We didn't have a choice its a sexual orientation and if you don't know that by now with all the knowledge at your disposal, you never will.

I find it so interesting that all of these Christians love talking about how Jesus loves you, and are quick to recite a couple of lines in the Bible to support their views. But in their haste in pointing out how their God is damning you they will overlook so very much of what else is written. I would point out to her that very little of what is written in the Bible is directly from the prophet Jesus. I would find it so very interesting that this same book that she is using to support her views on Gays is the same book that upheld slavery. And let us not forget what place women play in Christianity. They will always be considered less than since they come form Man. I am not a Christian. I do not believe in Sin. She has every right to believe in what she wishes, as long as that does not infringe on my right to be equal in our society.

People just need to grow up and stop taking things so personally.  She has her beliefs and "negative" views, just as LGBT community has their views about straights, religions, and Republicans.   If we expect everyone to be the same, that is not true diversity.   Stop looking for love in all the wrong places. Can't expect everyone to agree and accept. Be happy and move on.

Now that is all I ask for. I am not asking that people except my "lifestyle" but I ask that they respect it. I am not going to tell a person what they should or should not believe, that is THEIR believe. I respect this women more now. If we want to be accepted, we need to start accepting that there are some people out there that may not agree with how we are and respect there beliefs. To get respect we need to give it.

So Sherri Shepherd , the only reason why people are going to hell is because of people like you are driving gay and straight people away from church and God. Why would anyone want to be like you. "I like your Christ, I do not like your ChristiansYour Christians are so unlike your Christ." - Mahatma Gandhi... I hope all the people like you are held accountable one day for all of the damage you do to people, especially our youth. i would not have chosen a difficult lifestyle, but i would choose one very far away from people like you. i would rather take my chances on a pass to hell than a ride with people like you to heaven. 

She sounds like my mom did when I came out.  We were also brought up in the church, and I had to sit and listen to the constant damnation of the gays.  It's what we were told to believe.  I had no choice but to find another view, and it was NOT easy.  My mom had to as well, because I'm her son, but it was not easy.  The lady is saying she doesn't understand it because she was taught otherwise, but she loves everyone regardless.  That doesn't bother me.  It bothers me that people jump to the black card so quickly.    Being black is NOT the same struggle as being gay.  I know, I'm Black and gay.  She's aloud to have an opinion regardless of her race.  

LeNair Xavier's picture

The hatred spewed in most of these comments is how gays are too often their own worst enemy. Being narcissistic enough to say, "all or nothing".

If she's not gay herself, and is trying to undo the hate in herself that she's been taught, why should she take all? She can't. For she is going through a process of acceptance. And coming from a Christian background being told all your life that one will burn in hell for being a homosexual, it does not happen overnight. I know because that's why it took me so long to come out.

I'm still a God-believing man. I just don't go to church like I used to because the hypocrisy is now too much. Maybe because she's straight, Sherri Shepherd will never get to that point. But I'm not going to go hating on her when she unlike most shows that she's trying.

Wow! And people try to accuse me of being an "angry Black man" over racism, as if I have no reason. Meanwhile, these same people are coming here being "angry homosexuals" for no good reason. Stop sipping on that Hypocrisy you're drinking!

I am so tired of people using the bible to hate others. Of course she is homophobic - bit by saying it is her "religious belief" she thinks that gives her a free pass to hate others.
I am not sure what the gay lifestyle she speaks of is but that is as assinine as someone saying they aren't racist but they just don't agree with the "black lifestyle". Again its a pass to hate and not be held accountable!
Any religion that tells you to disown your children or not love and supports others in your life because of how they were born and who they love is not a true religion in my book. These religions that say if you are different then the rest of us "you will not go to Heaven" are nothing more then hateful bullies . The same can be said for those like Ms. Shephard who stand on their bibles in order to judge others. Its just made worse in this case because Ms. Shephard has the means to spew her hate on such a public level!

Ladycoper, you have no understanding of the word of God, apparently you are a none believer. The Bible as a whole teaches forgiveness and not hatred as you speak. It also sounds as if all sermons are about gay bashing, I think not. Ms. Shepard disagrees with your life style, orientation, gayness, birthright or what ever you choose to call it, she never said she hated you. That is the whole problem with people now days, if a person says anything the least bit negative about any group (except the white man of course) that person becomes homophobic, bigoted, racist and etc. I ask for what good does that attitude serve. This is coming from a white, honky, cracker, bigoted uneducated southern moronic hillbilly that served his country so we all could write this stuff and speak as we choose.

We agree to disagree.

What people refer to as "lifestyle" is as much a part of us as gay people as is our personalities, characteristics or beliefs. To say you disagree with one while loving the other just isn't possible. Being gay isn't a behavior.

In short - I believe people like Shari are trying to have their cake and eat it too. They are uncomfortable with gays (hence, "I don't agree with your lifestyle"), but they don't want to get criticized for it (hence, "But I love you!). Which is her right. Just don't codify discrimination based on your particular interpretation of the Bible.

EastoAK, You said being gay isn't behavior, then name the one greatest difference between being straight and gay.

I don't think there's much to interpret in the words, hate the sin but love the sinner. That " lover the sinner" just flies over everyone head for some reason.

Kind of like what Ms. Shepherd was saying.

You know she was brought up believing in the word of the Bible, we all could learn from that. There are a lot of belief systems out there that are not nearly as good as the one she was expose to. Don't you think so?

I have no idea what you are talking about? What great difference between being gay and straight? 

Not much to interpret? Uhm, I believe she (and many others) are lying. Maybe they don't do it consciously, but they are doing it. That flippant (and oh so convenient) term "love the sinner" doesn't fly over my head... I just don't believe it. But if that statement is what you need so you can feel better about yourself, then go right ahead. And I don't believe in the Bible... apparently the fact that some of us think it is mythology flied right over your head. And no, I don't think it is better than some other belief systems.

If you are trying to spread the Gospel, you are doing it in the wrong place.

I am so tired of people using the bible to hate others. Of course she is homophobic - bit by saying it is her "religious belief" she thinks that gives her a free pass to hate others.
I am not sure what the gay lifestyle she speaks of is but that is as assinine as someone saying they aren't racist but they just don't agree with the "black lifestyle". Again its a pass to hate and not be held accountable!
Any religion that tells you to disown your children or not love and supports others in your life because of how they were born and who they love is not a true religion in my book. These religions that say if you are different then the rest of us "you will not go to Heaven" are nothing more then hateful bullies . The same can be said for those like Ms. Shephard who stand on their bibles in order to judge others. Its just made worse in this case because Ms. Shephard has the means to spew her hate on such a public level!

i feel everyone has the right to believe what they want. but when she said i disagree with being gay but i love the person. now this is being a true Christian see feels our lifestyle is a sin and she is against it but she love us i believe the bible say love the sinner hate the sin even thou i don't believe God would have put me here just to be hated. my God is a loving God Anyways i guess im use to people that feel this way some of my own family says it the same way but the love me and except any man im dating.so as far as i can see if htey love us and dont bash our lifestyle even thou the dont agree it is on step closer to what we are thriving for God Bless yoy all

everybody gets so offended by all the things everybody else says; why does nobody seem to focus on the part where she's clearly making her best attempt to spread love and tolerance (if not acceptance) instead of the hate she was taught?

her whole idea here, is that although she was taught bigoted ideals, she is evolving out of them. just because she won't fold from the inside out and turn into a gay-loving, flag-waving supporter and crazy cheerleader, doesn't mean she isn't a tolerant, kind, loving person to anyone whom she meets.

it's awful how many of the gay folks we see on the internet and media insist that if someone doesn't fully assimilate, inside and out, to being a full-on gay ally, that they're still terrible people who don't value our lives.  that simply isn't true.  she says, clearly, that despite whatever religious teachings she was raised by, she still respects what's going on on our side of the fence, inasmuch as it is not her business nor place to rule what's inside our minds or out hearts.

she blatantly says that she MIGHT not agree with our "lifestyle."  i think outsiders often use "lifestyle" as a blanket term to explain why we are the way we are, because they know they can't fully dictate why any of us feel anything.  i agree there are plenty of times when it's used out of ignorance or out of hate, but i don't think this is one of them.  she admits that she doesn't understand how or why we are the way we are, but she DOES state that she loves and respects us anyway.

isn't that the point?  are we trying to earn respect and love in our world, or are we just upset that we're not #1 in the Miss Universe Pageant?

get a grip and calm your nerves, fellow gays.  not everybody will love every single thing that we do or talk about.  but if they at least speak and act kindly to us, from human to human, then really, isn't that all that matters in the first place?

LeNair Xavier's picture

Thanks, Daniel. I'm not the only one seeing it.

Bravo!!

I don't expect anyone to have blanket acceptance of me.  I am not at all offended by people who feel as if being Gay is not ok.  However I take offense at the term "lifestyle".  While the person using it may not understand why it's offensive, it highlights their ignorance of the issue.  NO ONE who is trying to understand LGBT folks would use that term; it conveys her ignorance as someone who has not bothered to read or hear 'from the horses mouth' WHO they are and what that means.
Pretty much the same way people are offended when  they hear, "All Black people live in the ghetto".  This statement conveys pure ignorance.

Have you figured out that I consider this person to be ignorant about LGBT people, much less LGBT issues? That's what I take offense at.  Don't talk about me if you're not trying to learn about me.

Karnora, you said, "Have you figured out that I consider this person to be ignorant about LGBT people, much less LGBT issues? That's what I take offense at.  Don't talk about me if you're not trying to learn about me."  I for one have no time to try and understand your being gay or what ever you call it, just like I don't try to understand quantum physics, brain surgery, badminton, bowling and a host of other things. So get off your high horse and live the life you want and disregard the things people say, I know from experience being a white honky bigoted southern uneducated ignorant cracker homophobic man. So don't come crying about being misunderstood.

Besides do you really think that Ms. Shepard is really upset about what you think of her, not a shot. Get over yourself.

Ellis, for someone who seems intent on telling everyone to "get over it" and "deal with it", you seem awfully pushy in your own views.  What exactly is your point on this site anyway?

That is a half assed statement if I ever heard one. Typical isn't it? If you're not anti gay just come out and say it. Don't hide behind antiquated religious teachings. Evolve please. This is why we are higher on the evolutionary scale.

this from the woman who thinks the world is flat....  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UkrkaH_V7fE

Bigotry by a black woman ,using Christianity as a defence, yep I hope you get to see god sooner than later sweet heart

Now you're sitting on your high horse bashing someone who isn't bashing you.

Think before you speak. She's accepting of our life choices, you should try to do the same.

I do not think she's anti-gay. I think she's an idiot.

I am gay, and I am not even in the vicinity of being offended by what she said, why? Because it makes perfect sense. I think it's full time we all grasp the concept that not everyone will like, accept or even tolerate our sexuality, and by forcing it upon them, makes it no better. She admitted how she feels, she went as far as to clarify her feelings, and even asked that we respect her and how she feels as she will do the same. And I RESPECT HER AND HOW SHE FEELS.

Let's see if Ms Shepherd respects the opinions of the KKK, and how they used her bible to justify their actions.

I think it is interesting how we have equated "race" to sexual orientation. They are two separate things.  Race is socially constructed by people to identify and stereotype groups of people to make ourselves feel better than others and to make others feel less desirable or wanted on this earth.  Race can not be clearly defined by genetics which is what makes us look the way that we look and which is also our primary means for determining race.  No I don't respect anyone that hates another group of people based upon what God gave them and placed them on this earth with. I however do believe that God put us here to abide by certain laws. I will abide by these laws and will attempt to teach my children these laws.  Love will be the first of these laws. Next will be the acceptance. We are too quick to judge. I don't have to be accepting go your choices, believes, desires, or whims. I however believe that respect is owe to all living creatures. Cursing you or poor treatment is not for me to give.

" I don't have to be accepting go your choices, believes, desires, or whims." 

And what, pray tell, does this mean?

What exactly about my "Lifestyle" do you not agree with? You don't even know me, What do you know about my lifestyle?

You don't even want to go there!!!!!!!

I wonder if anyone actually read the quote and not just the headlineWhat she said was: "I might not agree with your lifestyle, but I love you. You may not agree with my lifestyle, but you love me."  First, it's clear to me that she's speaking in general about ANY lifestyle.  And she's saying "I MIGHT not....", not "I DON'T".  If nothing else, she's admitting that everyone (including her) has bias - and so what?  That's absolutely true.  When did all this PC crap take over the world and we all have to say we love everyone and everything or someone's feelings will get hurt?  Don't we all think that Jehovah's Witnesses and Scientologists are completely insane?  Yes, those are choices (which Sherri goes to great lengths to say she doesn't believe being gay is a choice).  But, the point is still we all have opinions about everything and everyone. 

You are a very WISE individual. I am gay, and I am not even in the vicinity of being offended by what she said, why? Because it makes perfect sense. I think it's full time we all grasp the concept that not everyone will like, accept or even tolerate our sexuality, and by forcing it upon them, makes it no better. She admitted how she feels, she went as far as to clarify her feelings, and even asked that we respect her and how she feels. And I RESPECT HER AND HOW SHE FEELS. I applaud you.

She's just stupid !! 

Exactly

I can "almost" accept the fact that people are taught lessons from the bible as children and believe them without question.  However, once you become an adult and are able to question ideas on your own, well, there is a problem if you're going to still claim "that's what I was taught and believe".  Historical facts, ideas, and thoughts are proven wrong every day.  I still like her, just feel sorry that she's so insecure and worried about securing a spot in "Heaven". 
 

I agree with you, Chuli.  Your comments are exactly how I feel. 

So Sherri,  you are divorced and remarried which according to the bible you are committing adultery ,  which is a sin.  So that's ok? Or you will be in less hot part of hell??

She doesn't agree with my lifestyle and yet we have never even met. So she heard what the neighbors said about me and she came to the solid conclusion that I will burn in hell for eternity. I would like to ask Gawd to steer that type of people away from me so that I don't even have to interact with them.

Like wise I'm sure.

She needs to describe what exactly she means by "lifestyle". Describe "gay lifestyle" for your audience. What is it that ALL gay men do that you object to. You don't like they way they snap back at you when you accuse them of something you have not watched them do? Maybe if you just shut your mouth people won't give you a hard time for being ignorant and brain-washed.

Do you really want to go there?

Snapping back really really scares me!!!!!!!

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