How do I get rid of man boobs? I’ve gained some weight, and with summer in full swing, I’ve got to get rid of these things. Help!!
Jerry Joe via Internet
Not to worry! Usually “man boobs” can be easily controlled with some weight management techniques, including exercise. There is no such thing as “spot” training for one specific body part. I get asked all the time, “How do I focus on this or that?” My response is always to treat your body as a whole, both inside and out. Some of these simple suggestions will help reduce the extra weight all over, including the chest. It’s best to start with a good cardio program to help burn enough calories to lose some weight. If you aren’t currently doing any cardio, start a regimen of 20 to 30 minutes of exercise three times a week. Add time and intensity as you get stronger—always make it a challenge. You can also change the shape of the musculature of your chest by doing a well-rounded routine of weight lifting and muscle conditioning. A good place to start is dumbbell bench presses, dumbbell incline bench flys and dumbbell decline bench presses. These three exercises will target the muscles of the pectoral group to help you build lean muscle, which will in turn use more calories daily and help with that weight management. A win-win! —PK
TEST OF LOVE
I just started dating an amazing guy. I think it’s love! We haven’t had sex yet, but I know we will soon, which leads me to my problem. I have never been good at knowing how to gracefully ask the “What’s your HIV status?” question. What advice do you have for me to start that conversation so we can both share our statuses and ideally get tested together? It’s really important to me to get that settled before we have sex, but I never know the best way to throw it out there. Thanks!
Hobie Rowe Des Moines, IA
Thinking ahead about HIV is the key. Getting tested together promotes trust in a relationship. You haven’t exactly said if you’ve been tested before or, if so, when. Think through how you’d feel about yourself or your amazing guy if either or both of you tested HIV positive. Finding out your or another’s status isn’t the same as going to a movie and deciding if you like the ending. There are initial reactions and sometimes feelings that develop later. When you’re ready to pop the question, ask him in a private but nonsexual setting. You’ll want your surroundings conducive to privacy and sharing. Please know there are steps involved in the approach you’ve wisely chosen, and not all decisions are best made at once. First agree to be tested together. Hold off on declaring undying love for each other no matter what. If neither of you knows your status, there are four possible outcomes: He’s positive, you’re not. You’re positive, he’s not. You’re both negative or both positive. Each outcome presents different responsibilities that a doctor can explain. HIV is no longer a death sentence, and whatever the results, you can love and be loved. Let us know where you register for your wedding! —FP
BLOODY MESS
On more than one occasion in the past six months, I have noticed what appears to be blood in my semen. When it first occurred, I visited my regular physician, who did some tests, which all came back negative. Since I had a complete physical less than six months earlier, he said it would go away on its own, which it did. Last night, though, it was really dark reddish brown, the darkest that I have noticed. I have been in a monogamous relationship for 32 years. Other than a lot of stress from my job, I feel fine. What should I do?
Jon-Ivan Weaver San Francisco, CA
This very frightening condition, hematospermia, occurs when a man ejaculates blood mixed in with semen. Most cases occur after masturbation or anal intercourse and are usually benign. The first time it happens, however, you might run screaming to your doctor. Caused by traumatic rupture of any of the many blood vessels that supply the prostate and the seminal vesicles, hematospermia is usually self-limiting and resolves on its own within several weeks. Men with persistent bouts of hematospermia should be checked out by a urologist to identify a specific cause. This can include infection of the prostate and, in rare cases, cancer. Blood in the urine also qualifies for a complete urological evaluation. —FS
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