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Are Dating Apps Better Than Nightclubs?

Are Dating Apps Better Than Nightclubs?


Is Dating Digitally Easier?

#SINGLE. Alright, I’m constantly telling you how rough the dating scene is…at least in West Hollywood, California. Yes, we have a variety of men including plenty of Instagram models, retired twinks, and silver foxes to name a few. With bountiful men comes plenty of options. However, I consistently find myself coming up short. While online dating is not my preference, I’ve found many comparisons to how gay men interact in person and online. It makes me question: Is online dating easier than approaching someone at a bar?

Okay, let’s go through the cons of online dating: I’m well aware of the heinous acts which may occur. There’s a handful of people catfishing – or using a fake profile – to accumulate nude photographs and simply just cyber as they chat with someone under the guise of meeting. Online dating, depending on which website you are using, may essentially seem like a virtual bathhouse. To this day, rather than a hello or an emoji, I’ll receive a photograph of someone’s genitals and typically it’s not something I wish to see. But, alas, my curiosity still gets the best of me and I’m constantly checking my dating apps – and have yet found success. So yes, it’s obvious there are some seedy people on the internet, but those types are everywhere. At least you aren’t having to actively deal with them in person.


However, I can’t help but feel more people have confidence online than they do in their real lives. Prime examples are the Keyboard Warriors which overcome our social media on a daily basis. It’s easiest to live through an avatar than your actual being, for sure. Yet, if someone is actually true to their real life persona as they are to their online identity: Will online dating benefit them?


Chances are, if I’m out at a bar, I’m strictly out to enjoy a night with my friends and minimally socialize with anyone outside of our group or the bar staff. Paint me with the Millennial scarlet letter, but I tend to pregame and end up living my best life without worrying on making a lasting impression on other patrons. Hell, even if someone spots me in a retail store among errands; I’m not necessarily looking to be swooned: I’d rather get what I need and leave! I’m not really familiar with the days before dating websites and apps existed, so what am I to do? Go to the library or join a book club? That’s not in my cards.


Immediately when browsing on an app, you see someone’s photograph: Exactly as you’d seem them in real life – sans filter. On your dating profile, you’re able to give a biography of yourself and link to your various social media accounts. Which is something I don’t find available to a stranger upon seeing them in person. It’s a way to dive into who they truly may be: Their friends, hobbies, occupation, and even family. I can get a much better read on someone through the internet – at the very least what they wish to portray – than in person. To me, it’s literally the same type of first impression you can get nearly anywhere. With an option to meet in public rather than walking in anonymously, I believe online dating is – dare I say it – healthier. Which is a little scary if you consider human interaction is becoming so scarce. Although I don’t side with online dating: Why am I seeing the advantages to it?


Do you prefer to meet your new potential knights in shining armor in person or over the internet?


This post is the opinion of this contributing writer to Instinct Magazine. Opinion pieces do not always reflect the stance of the magazine or the other contributing writers.

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rugguer's picture
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No because a picture does not give you chemistry.  Plus with all the apps to change stuff on a pic they may not look the same..I like in person meetings chemistry smile funny intelligent voice swagger..you get that from in person not an app..people need to get out and meet not hide and swipe.

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