If I Haven't Had Relations In A While, Am I Now Asexual?

I'm not into hooking up for just sex.  If I needed to get off that bad, I have a hand, toys, and my imagination.  Even though I live in one of the gay meccas of the US, I don't hook up much at all.  To be honest, I think I may average once or twice a year.  After you weed out the emotionally unavailable men, the ones in open relationships, the drug users, the porn stars, the call boys, there isn't much left. I joke often that I am a virgin again, the cherry has grown back, I'm asexual.  We know we can't turn back the hands of time and pop that cherry back in, so the two former are not true.  But what about the latter?  Am I now asexual? What does it mean to be asexual?  And if I was asexual, do I have representation in the LGBT community?

 

Most people are familiar with the battles the LGBT community has faced because,  thanks to the legalization of same-sex marriage in many states, it’s easy to stay up-to-date on issues affecting gay and lesbian couples. And due to mass media coverage of celebrated Olympic-gold-medalist-turned-reality-show-star Caitlyn Jenner, much awareness has been raised for the transgender community. But not every group of people has been so lucky to have had their cause in the spotlight. And the asexual community is one of those groups. It’s about time their voices were heard, so we’re taking a closer look. - cheatsheet.com

 

  at  cheatsheet.com elaborates on asexuality in these three subsections:

 

What asexuality is, and is not

Many people choose to abstain from certain vices, such as alcohol, or even sex, for personal reasons. An asexual person, though, doesn’t even find it tempting to get busy with someone else. And unlike celibacy, asexuality is not a choice, it’s a sexual orientation. Those who identify as asexual simply aren’t drawn to another person’s physical anatomy.

Additionally, asexuality is not a disorder  .... (read more over at cheatsheet.com)

Asexual people can still enjoy romance and physical pleasure

Though it may seem a person who identifies as asexual would steer clear of any sort of intimacy, there’s an important distinction between being sexually attracted to another person, and having a relationship. Asexual people still want, and need, personal relationships. Although they are not driven by physical desires, some relationships within the asexual community do have a romantic element. 

Being asexual also doesn’t rule out physical pleasure ... (read more over at cheatsheet.com)

Why you may know nothing about it

Perhaps people don’t know much about asexuality because it’s often left out of otherwise well-known terms. The Fund for Global Human Rights, for instance, uses LGBTI, which includes lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and intersex (a person born with a reproductive anatomy that doesn’t fit the typical definition of male or female) people ... (read more over at cheatsheet.com)

 

Are you asexual?   Are you more into the relationship with a person and the sex is something you do to keep them happy, but you find it not an important part of you being together?

Do you seek out people based on sexual interests or do you seek out people for their lack of interest in sexuality?

What are your thoughts?  

 

h/t: cheatsheet.com

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I never really thought about it much but now that I have read this, I now realize that I am asexual.  

Yes, I enjoy sex, but on my terms. 

I have been in a relationship for almost 3 years now and i love my boyfriend with my whole being. But sex isn't that high on my priority list. Like I said, it has to be on my terms. Hey often tries to get me to do what he wants. Like putting my hands on him while we are in bed. I doesn't work. I usually just turn over and fall asleep. But if he let's me make the advances in am very happy to have sex. But that isn't very often. Maybe once or twicea month.  

So Yes I am asexual.  I am happy and i know my bf is. For some reason he puts up with me. And I am happy. 

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