"I'm A 6 And I Hooked Up With A 10. I Need Help Before I Do Something Stupid."

While most of our writers are stuffing themselves with holiday cheer, we thought we would share some of our more memorable stories from recent months.

There's been many stories from Reddit and other web hosts that we've shared with you where gay men, straight men, and women have asked for advice in life.  Is he gay, am I gay, how much should I be gay for pay for?  The advice you've given has been funny, serious, and has also been responsible for some of their own W.T.F. moments. 

Apparently one of our readers is in need of some assistance. Apparently he is calling himself "Crush to crushed".  Here is his story.

I've seen you post stories a few times on your page and I am in desperate need of help before I do something stupid and make a complete fool of myself. Can you please post? Here's how it goes:

Ok.  I'm about to get vulnerable with the Internet world about a very hot one night stand.  Why? 1) because I'm looking for unbiased advice, and 2) I don't want to talk to my friends about this just yet. I'm a little embarrassed. I'm embarrassed because I'm crushing hard for a guy that I don't even know.

Here's my story: I'm a west coast guy that just moved to NYC a few months ago. During my time in the city I've been active on Grindr, going out to the local bars and meeting guys that I bring home and I've attended a few sex parties. I'm a sexual person (all safe). Everyone that I've met has all been in casual fun and I have not had interest in continuing anything further. Until Saturday night.

I was walking home from a bar in Hell's Kitchen, taking my normal route. It was like a scene out of a movie. Being at the right place at the right time. This tall, gorgeous blonde looked up from his phone at a moment that was just perfect. His beautiful blue eyes met mine and I said hello. It just felt right to say hello. I would never speak to a stranger on the streets of NYC at 3AM. He smiled and asked me how far the subway was and told me he was visiting. I don't remember exactly our conversation. I just remember the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. The flush feeling in my cheeks.

We were both clearly drunk and somehow the conversation led us back to my bedroom. I kept telling myself this was too good to be true. This guys meets all of the physical qualities that I like in a guy, but they're qualities that someone who did have them all probably wouldn't be interested in me. He kept wanting to go right for it, taking his clothes off, trying to take mine off. I kept stopping Him. How could this guy want me? I told him that I think he's too drunk and I don't want him to regret this later. I kept suggesting that he get a cab home. But no, he insisted that he knew what he was doing and that he wanted to be with me. So then we did it ... and Wow... we had amazing sex filled with deep kissing and exploring each other's body. It started off soft and slow and then rough and so hot. (colorful description of body parts.  After maybe two hours of just [doing it], we finally both passed out. I remember the sun was just starting to rise.

All of sudden I woke up, it was 9am. I knew what happened and immediately my insecurities kicked in. The sun was shining off the tanned naked body of what could be a model laying next to me in bed. I didn't want him to see me. If he was a 10, then I'd call myself a 6. Ive only ever hooked up with other 6's. I started to wake him up, telling him I had plans and that he needed to go. He was delusional for a moment, what happened, where am I, how did we get here? I responded and told him he needed to go... "What plans?" He asked? "Brunch plans with some friends" I responded.  He tried to pull me next to him, I held back, he said "take me with you to brunch." I'm thinking he can't be serious. I don't want to give him the opportunity to spend any more time with me to realize that he regrets what he did. Then he got on top of me, and we had another passionate round of sex. Probably the best I've ever had.

When we were finished I got up, poured him a glass of water and gave him some Tylenol. I just looked at him and said "I'm sorry but I have to get ready and go. Do you need to use the bathroom before you leave?" I didn't really have brunch plans, I wish I had the confidence to tell him to stay with me until he felt like leaving. But I don't. I know I have to work on that.

So he got up, collected everything on my floor that had fallen out of his pockets and got dressed. He used the bathroom and I showed him to the door. As he exited my apartment he turned around. I don't know for what, maybe a kiss, maybe to exchange contact information. Maybe to say thank you, who knows. But I just said "have a good day" and closed the door.

The look on his face was heartbreaking to see. It was like he didn't understand why I was treating him this way, and honestly, I don't understand either. So then I just watched him from my window as he walked down my block to the subway. I didn't know I could feel this way about a one night stand. But the way I feel is similar to how I felt when I got rejected by my high school crush. So heartbroken. I just stayed home a sulked about this the rest of the day.

None the less, the reason why I'm asking for advise is because my cleaning lady just left and she found his college ID card under my bed. So I know his name and found him on Instagram. Should I reach out to him? If I do, should I apologize? Or just let it go? Scratch up to another one night stand where I got lucky with a 10? I've lost sleep over this. He made me feel so good but so insecure at the same time. It's complicated to explain. I can't stop thinking about him. And yes, I have already considered seeking therapy so please give me some solid advice that I can discuss with my new shrink. Thanks! ~Crush to crushed  

 

I know what I would tell him, but I will bite my tongue on here and email him separately.

What is your advice for this man in need of some advice?

Post your thoughts below or share on FB to see if your friends would give the same advice.

Comments

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my guess is this ship has sailed, but for future reference: if everything is going just the way you'd want it to, let it keep going!  attraction is hard to explain and you might be just as much a 10 to the guy you think is out of your league as he is to you.

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Please, how old are you? 6, 10, 7, 5, what difference does it make. Be confident in your self, that's what makes a 10

 

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Apologize and explain to him what you just said here. I'm pretty sure he'll understand.

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Be human, apologize.  But, have no expectations. Trust me, just reaching out will help you get over your vulnerabilities.  In this day and age, finding a soulmate is like finding a needle in a haystack.  Nowadays all you find are men that only seek unsafe thrills or bills, and the internet is full of scraps.  So, take a chance...reach out!

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You weren't very kind to him. You have to find a way to apologize and explain without obsequiously telling him how much better looking he is than you because that's a turnoff.

I might try "I was so surprised to run into you and have such a good time that I didn't expect with such a great guy, and I got a little overwhelmed. I'm sorry"

I'm concerned that everything you said was about you and you didn't really consider that you might have been hurting his feelings and that he has the right to choose who he wants. You don't get to pick that a 10 shouldn't fuck a 6 if the 10 wants to

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Meeting a great person is hard enough without getting in your own way. In other words, get out of your head and contact the guy apologize for the way you acted and ask him out to brunch or dinner. Ask if he is willing to go out and get to know each other. If he's what you think he is isn't it worth you both getting to know each other. Start over, we don't often get a second chance.

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