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Sam Smith: Tinder and Grindr Kill Romance

 Out British crooner Sam Smith says you should dump your man-apps.

“No offense to people who go on Tinder but I just feel like it’s ruining romance, I really do,” he said. “We’re losing the art of conversation and being able to go and speak to people and you’re swiping people.”

He added: “From my experience the most beautiful people I’ve been on dates with are the dumbest, so why would I swipe people who are ‘unattractive’ when I could potentially fall in love with them? Stop Tinder and Grindr!”

So is Smith, who came out in May,  seeing someone?  “I’ve been on a couple of dates,” he said. “I’m good at dates. I used to get really nervous but now I’m better. There is one particular guy that I’ve been on a few dates with. I like him but who knows?”

Either he found him the old fashioned way, or somebody swiped right.

Your thoughts?

* Ditch the dating apps.

* Who's "dating?" It's all about hookups.



He's correct if you're surrounded by other dateable gay men and choose Grindr to communicate with them. For a lot of Americans though, now that the Christian Right bought up the gay dating sites and destroyed them, Apps are the only way to find the other gays in the neighborhood.

He's a Brit! Of course, he's come out and dismisses American ingenuity, so that he can sell his crappy songs! Can you tell me what happen to George Michael and even Ricki Martin after they came out? Has either made any groundbreaking music since? Although neither is actually gay, I can name ALL of their heterosexual girlfriends. And, it's quite a few!

The stupidity that flows through every word of this comment baffles me...

Fuck u TROLL!! Lol

Most guys I meet in person, and not through any app or site, are not a match, either. And almost none of them can communicate and again, I am talking about "in person". It really takes a very long time to know someone, and when you do, you might like them romantically or you may not. But you do have to know them first. The gorgeous body beauty will fade, just like every flower will wilt. And after that, the friendship remains. When a person "grows" on you, it simply means that the imperfect person you first met is showing more of its good qualities to you, and you find yourself attracted to them. Pictures on apps or profiles are almost always the person's very best shots and they are invariably several years old. Beware, online or offline.

I partially agree. I think it's also about learning to reach out and connect socially, people might have a lot to offer even if they're not your "type" or into your kinks. Those apps are fine as long as you keep an open mind.

Totally agree !! Always the same 3 questions !! Top or Bottom? How many inches? Your place or mine? And that's usually it. Too sad for words. I gave up on them and started talking to guys I liked again. Much more adventures and exciting. Love being out there again:

All true but I dont think it's ever been so easy for people to have such low expectations of each other gratified as perhaps in the past. I enjoy the apps but some people are almost dependent on them. Just as with anything else, too much of a good thing ain't no good for you.

I'm so tired of statements like this being made. People act like before apps like Tinder and Grindr were around, everyone was a master at communication, and that everyone sat around writing love letters to each other like we were in "The Notebook".

No. Gay men were STILL hooking up. Before it was Grindr, it was Craigslist. Before Craigslist, it was Adam 4 Adam. Before A4A, it was gay bars, truck stops, etc. Apps are just a new way to do things and people are afraid of change.

Apps like Grindr and Scruff are what you make of them. Lower your expectations of what said app is supposed to do for you, and you'll be better off.

They can be exhausting, yes, but one thing they taught me was that you DON'T necessarily have to go to a sleazy bar just to hook up, find a date, or meet someone new. And that there are gays hiding out all around you, though you may not realize it. I've hooked up, been on dates, made new friends, and even gotten my heart broken from guys I met on apps.

Sorry for this novel; I know people don't like to read. But I'm so over people saying stuff like this.

You're so right though. I also hate people ragging on these apps. I live abroad, and I've been able to learn so much about the country by meeting an amazingly wide array of gay men through Grindr. Every social class, every type -- they all have Grindr. You can go on a date with a Communist leader one night and a CEO the next. It's just another way to meet people. You don't have to give up other forms of communication. 

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