Joel Perry's picture

What Is "Masculine" and Where Do You Fall on the Spectrum?

 Few things scream "masculine" like a rough sport like rugby. National Public Radio interviewed gay rugby players about what counts as masculine and found evolving definitions. Take a quick read and see where you are on the spectrum.

"I would say in a lot of ways, I definitely carry myself as a man," says Jeremy Ballard, 33, who plays with the Colorado Rush, a gay rugby team in Denver.  "I feel like I'm a man, but I definitely have feminine qualities. Like my voice tends to be more feminine. I'm emotional."

 Player Fabio Castro says, "There's all different types and shades of masculinity. Just because somebody listens to Mariah [Carey] doesn't mean that they're not going to kick your ass on the field. So many different shades of masculinity, and I've learned that ... it's OK to be who you are."

Teammate Mike Fuller, 30, says his family and friends imprinted on him a clear distinction between straight men and gay men. "The idea that I had in my head of what a gay guy was, was a drag queen," he says. "That's what I thought I was supposed to be. ... If I'm gay, then I'm going to have to start wearing a dress at some point — and I have," he says, laughing.

For rugby player Skyler Meyer, at 21, the team's youngest player, coming out of the closet meant his sexuality was settled, but his gender — the way he held himself and interacted with others — was still in flux.

"I fell into the stereotypes," Meyer says. "I didn't have any big gay role models. I grew up always wanting to be a lawyer, and I realized I was gay and was like, 'Oh, well now I have to be a hair stylist or something.' And it was just devastating to me," he says with a laugh.

So our question for our readers is, exactly what is "masculine" to you?

* Butching it up on the field.

* Having the balls to be femme.

* Does it even matter today?

 

Comments

Look, I think this article is a tiny bit stupid. I think being gay is just about who you're attracted to. If you grew up wanting to be a Lawyer then realized that since you're gay you need to change your career path to being a hair stylist, I think that just means you were surrounded by stereotypes your whole life. I think some people decibel themselves as just being gay, and i others just say it's a part of theur life and live how they choose. I'm gay and I've always liked girly things over boy toys. But that wad just what I liked growing up. I was never one to hide the things I liked. Why would anyone do that is beyond me. But as a grown gay man, I don't think that I should wear women's clothes to be more comfortable w my sexuality. That's actually a turn off for me. I like masculine manly men, maybe bc Im not the most masculine man on this planet, but it's what I like. It's all about personal opinion.

It probably doesn't matter today in the big picture, but to some people it is still of the utmost importance. To those people, masculinity means being like Robert De Niro. The epitome of masculinity in many people's books, straight and gay. Personally, I feel that masculinity entails not acting brutish, stoic and cocky. That is what masculinity means to me. 

Correction: Personally, I feel that masculinity is all about acting brutish, stoic and cocky. That is what masculinity means to me.

I wish that the gay community was not obsessed with the common comment of "well I date men because I like a man Well guess what I am a man! I just like to shop  hangout with girls. I also like to play sports

Masculinity is like gender. It's not black and white, but a huge spectrum of grey.
The guys From CO Rush embody that spectum as well. Along with all gay rugby players.
The secondary point being, Rugby is better than Football ;)

Add new comment