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YouTuber Secretly Records His Emotional Coming Out To Mom

Grab your tissues!

YouTuber, Ryan, came out to his mom in October and secretly recorded the entire exchange with his laptop. 

Check out how his mother responds to the emotionally charged news. 

Explaining his decision to record and share his coming out, Ryan says:

I made this video because when I was contemplating coming out for the last year, I found other similar videos of people coming out to family members on a hidden camera really helpful. I noticed that there weren’t very many of these videos, so I wanted to create my own to help other people in the same way that I found these videos helpful.

If you’ve created a similar one, I guarantee you I’ve seen it, so thank you so much for helping me. My mom reacted in an amazing way, and I really hope that all of you have a similar experience.

What do you think of Ryan's decision to share his big moment with the world? And what are your thoughts on his mother's response?


(H/T: The Gaily Grind)


Probably the lamest 'coming out' I have ever seen. I had to know his mom was going to okay with it, he was trying to make it a bigger deal then it ever was. DRAMA QUEEN!!! Save the hardship for those of us that have no relationship with family because of sexuality. Be grateful you have a mom that is so cool, has opposed to one that asks you "are you sure?" 12 years later.

I'm guessing you are alone James

That's pretty mean man. He obviously loves his mom, and had been mulling it all over in his head for a while now. He is crying from relief and being able to let go of all the  all the pent-up anxiety! He would have been terrified to think she would have had a problem. She is very sweet, I'm always a bit jealous of people with moms like that. As for you, try to be a little kind, don't let your own bad experiences embitter your soul to such an extent that you can't be happy for other people.

how insensitive. it's not his fault or anyone's else's that you don't have a good family. shame on you for trying to ruin his experience that he was so gracious to share.

Compassion and love do miracles for the fear that we are somehow flawed gay or not.

Congratulations on your courage and strength.  It truly is all about love.  If my son came out to me I should hope to be as loving and caring as your mom. I hope you are always blessed with great love and understanding through your life.

I think Ellen would love meeting both of you! Good job mom! Brave Ryan!

He's lucky. My moment came after my 2nd nervous breakdown and first suicidal incident.  Couldn't speak to anyone for two days and when I was finally able to say something.  Mom was hurt but accepting and dad pretended nothing ever happened.  I was 19. As soon as I could, I moved as far away from home as possible so I wouldn't be an embarrassment to the family (I have 3 brothers).  It took time, but as time went on and they realized it was who I was and it was what it was, I'm just one of the family and I happen to be gay.  That was 1978... times have changed.

I was 15 when I told my mother I was gay.  She said if she ever saw me again she would kill me.  That was 43 years ago, and I have never seen or spoken to her since that day.  I'm truly glad this went well for you, this is how it should be.  Best wishes to you both!

it kind of reminds me of when I came out.. my mom was very supportive and when she told my dad all he said was "Yeah? What's for dinner."

THAT is exactly the reaction all parents should have.

I think that the most important thing is to know that all parents want for their kids is to truly be happy. and we know living in this society the hate and the hard life you have to live to love whoever you want to love will not be happy. and will always be mocked or treated differently. I think that is the hardest part of being a parent knowing that your lifestyle will be a difficult one. 

parents only want the best for their child.

This is from a Single puertorican mom who was raised in a Roman Catholic church...its all about LOVE!

Good job Ryan! I know it takes a lot of courage to come out to loved ones but you get such a sigh of relief once they know right? Like this giant weight has been lifted from your shoulders. If you ever need to talk just send me an email! My door's always open. :) 

This is very empowering to any person gay or straight! I give Ryan huge props to be able to do something like this! I could never imagine anything like this being a straight woman...but the idea and story behind it this was something he was battling with inside him to tell his mother and he had the courage to do so! Ryan you are very strong and your mother is amazing and every parent should be like this for their children! coming out was horrible.  I'm so happy for you and the hope that you are giving younger people by coming out this way.  HUGE Kudos to your mom for being amazing.  God Bless you and your whole family!

its the same all over the world. My coming out was really simillar. Good job :)


Blackness, you're a complete and utter asshole.  I hope you DO have a child that's gay.  Wait, actually for his sake, I hope you don't.  You're are the kind of bully that make kids hang themselves.  Screw you and your intolerance and hate.  

You want him

I know you mean Fairly Awesome Generation!

Darkeness, stop being so jealous and just come out, Didn't you know that Homophobic Men are most Aroused by Gay Male Porn? No? Then I suggest you read this.... Homophobia is associated with sexual excitement by male-on-male sex.

i hope you never have a child who comes out..your a sad case of a human...

I assume by "FAG" you mean "AWESOME BRAVE AND HONEST MAN."

Thank you for showing the entire world a huge reason WHY Ryan was so scared to "come out" to his mother. Time for you to crawl back under your rock from 1953.

he should be scared, that's NASTY SHIT 

You're a nasty excuse for a human being.  People like you are the reason I don't want to live on this planet anymore.


Really, Patrick and Craig? Really? He just came out to his mother, which was obviously very hard for him, and all you two can brood over is how attractive he is? And shame on you, Craig, for exploiting such a sentimental moment between he and is mother. I am a gay man, and it's not difficult to see that this guy is attractive; however, there is a time and place for everything. Flattery, and your own personal perversions, have no place in this situation. So, please, let us not continue to give the gay community a bad reputation with your imprudent, distasteful comments.


I had to come out over the phone to my mom. But of course mothers always know the truth deep down.

He should get his own reality show and documentary. Look how crying on YouTube has benefited that bridegroom guy.

Ryan, you and your mom make me very happy.  I am a 61 year old gay man and grew up in very different circumstances.  Both of my parents were Free Will Baptist ministers and the last time my mother hugged me or gave me a kiss was when I was 5.  That was the way our father wanted it.  Being homosexual was terrifying, especially when you heard both of your parents condeming it from the pulpit!  Eventually my family had me committed to the Missouri state mental institution to have me "fixed".  And then there were the long years of loneliness and alcoholism!  But then things began to change....quickly!  Today I have 25 years of sobriety and am surrounded by more friends, who are my family, than I ever imagined.  The weight that was on my shoulders is now a long distant memory.  Everything that happened to me was based upon a lie and ignorance.  In seeing your experience, and the response of your wonderful mother, my heart is filled with more joy that I EVER expected when I was at your tender age.  Your mother is right, of course.  You're still the very same guy you were before......except now a weight that never should have been there is now gone from your shoulders.  God speed Ryan! 

Lee J.

Even the dog is okay with it. Now play some Scrabble!

All any person coming out wants is to still be loved by the ones that they love and to not disappoint their parents. It is a true tragedy when a child's parents are also their first bullies. Congratulations Ryan on a loving family!!! Very heartwarming. It's also very cute when the dog makes an appearance.

His mom doesn't like it when people 'broadcast their sexuality'?   Hello, does that include YouTube?

All I can say is you are wayyy adorable. Handsome guy!

When I came out to my mom she was like "Ok, anything else????" And life just went on from there. No more hiding and my family are surprisingly totally awesome about it. 

This is a very sweet video. Congratulations Ryan for making your first steps "out of the closet" that will continue as long as you live. As a 45 year old "out" gay I still need to tell some people I don't know when it matters for whatever situation I am in. I don't "look" gay so people assume I'm straight unless I tell them.

For the commenter Papi - this is not a hate jab at you, just a reminder this world is not about YOU and how you think it should be. Ryan is a young man who is just coming out; he has told his best friend, cousin and mother, has not yet told his father, and you sound like you expect him to be running his own GLBT teenage suicide prevention help center, advising on school GSA programs and feeding gay homeless youth. How much of that you do - or do you only post self-important comments? You do not know what Ryan will do in the future - this is where he is at now, doing what he said he wanted to do in posting this early stage coming out video. Good for him and I think this is very brave, not at all selfish. Papi - think about others and where they are in their lives before you criticize them and lay your own values, expectations and for all I know regrets upon them. I do not know you or your story - I am only reacting to your (in my mind) poorly chosen words.

Wow this video makes me think of when I came out to my own mother. I am an openly gay black man who loves white & hispanic men and my ex blackmailed into telling my mom and that was the scariest experience ever. However, it was the greatest decision she was completely supportive but completely shocked. To anyone in Ryan's boat always remember this " you'd rather someone hate you for who you are than love you for someone you're not". As long as you have that attitude on life you'll make it. Ryan you're an amazing person and very, very, very brave and I thank you for making this video because it trully is beautiful.. Have a wonderful life my LGBT brother.

Brave kid, and awesome MOM.

something I never got to tell my mom, and I regret it.

Brave kid, and awesome MOM.

something I never got to tell my mom, and I regret it.

nice bro congratulations, but a think I´ll never gonna do that the reaccions moms its not gonna be like your bu I glad for you

Your Mom is one special lady...she truly knows "unconditional love."   I wished my "Mom, I'm gay" was this wasn't. 

And, by the way, your Mom is not just telling you you're handsome because you're her are HOT, my friend and (obviously) have a good soul and that makes you a burnin' love.   I love "I loved you when I first met you."  

The one thing I hope, is that as Ryan continues with his life, he changes his mind about "if he could choose, he would choose the easier".  Just because folks are heterosexual, that doesn't make their lives easier.  Everyone has challenges.  Just ask Britney.  It all gets to be so much more fun when you don't give in to the drama we all enjoy injecting into our lives when we are young.  We also begin to not let what other people say bring us down so much.  I wish you a fabulous and fun life Ryan.  It's gonna be great.

Great comment that is beautifully written with simple, but, powerful advice.  Kudos.  Happy holidays. call Ryan selfish and say he should reach out to others instead of filming his own coming out....well this is one way he is trying to reach out to others (guess you didn't stop long enough to read his statement at the end as you were too busy judging). I alos know that Ryan does a great deal of work trying to help others who may feel they don't have the support they need when coming out...check out his organization called "The Friend Movement"....I was very lucky to have understanding parents who accepted me when I came out, but I also had a friend who was kicked out by his parents when he came out to them, and I took him in when he had no where else to go until he could get on his feet and make his own way....I applaud anyone in our community who tries to help another....way to go Ryan!!!

Hi, Michael.  Ryan is selfish.  He didn't consider his mother's feelings prior to his coming out announcement (maybe she didn't want to be filmed? maybe she would have preferred to change her clothing or be filmed in a different position than on her back on the sofa?)  He may actually be a great guy.  I hope he is.  His mother seems to think he's a great guy, so he is definitely blessed to have a positive relationship with his mother.  His being a nice guy who does nice things does not change the fact that he is selfish.  Do you need further proof of his narcissism: why start your own organization instead of learning how to work with and network with other organizations already in existence?  Be careful, Michael.  Just because you like someone does not mean you give them a pass when their behavior is inappropriate.  I'm glad Ryan is loved; I'm glad he has a great relationship with his mother; I'm glad he feels accepted; I'm glad he is helping others (as you state).  I do wish him the best.  None of the things that make me glad, though, negate the fact that his actions on camera were selfish.  Happy Holidays, Ryan and Michael.

For all of the amazing things that have occurred in the past two decades to change people's attitudes towards the LBGTQQIA community AND in no disrespect towards the way in which the mother states, "Oh, yes, honey, I will always love you.  I'm sure,"  BUT, I do find this video trivializing and selfish.  I find Ryan selfish.  Not everything has to be broadcast to the world and not everything counts as "reality" tv.  Ryan has a good mother and a great relationship, it appears, with her.  God bless him.   Let the allegedly-liberal hatemail against me commence, but I would consider Ryan less selfish if he were to focus his energies on reaching out to those youth who don't have the support he does.  Film that.

This is fantastic, very heartwarming. I love how cool, calm, supportive and loving Ryan's mom is. She Rocks! Ryan is a super cutie. Best Wishes!

so great!!!!   mazel tov and so glad for you is love ......yay

It is very sweet. I thank him for sharing it. Millions of us never got to have this moment. 

I love it! Way to go Ryan!


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