Clearly someone recorded our conversation after a two-for-one happy hour because these wails of agony over our singledom are all too familiar.

An adorable three-year old tells his parents exactly how he feels about Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard's unwillingness to let gays get married in the country. 

Check out all the angst after the jump.

Updated Wednesday, 12:15 p.m. est

Jamie Jackson, the teenager who was body slammed by a New South Wales police officer at Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras over the weekend, is speaking out about the incident for the first time. Follow the break for his first video interview since the video of him being assaulted by police officers went internationally viral. 

The Australian LGBT community and their allies will take to the streets in Sydney to protest the shocking police brutality that was caught on tape there during the Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras celebration over the weekend. 

James Franco is not happy that his friend and collaborator, Travis Mathews's feature film, I Want Your Love, has been banned in Australia due to its sexual content.

The film features unsimulated gay sex and apparently Australia film commission just can't handle it--even for generally more lenient film festival circuit. 

James speaks out on the ban in a self-made video (notably absent of unsimulated gay sex) after the jump!

Filmmaker Travis Mathews has made quite a splash (take that as you well) on the festival circuit with his feature film, I Want Your Love, which garnered a lot of attention (including James Franco's) for its inclusion of unsimulated gay sex. 

Unfortunately, while the film's been on the must-see list for many LGBT film festivals around the world, it looks like it won't be making its way Down Under. The film, which was scheduled to be screened at the Melbourne Queer Film Festival, has been banned by Australia's Classification Board. 

More after the jump. 

Attention Aussiephiles or anyone who simply adores Australia's greatest national export, Matthew Mitcham: Happy Australia Day! To celebrate, the gorgeous Olympian and DJ Dan Murphy (one of the men behind Mardi Gras) have mashed-up 17 songs into an ode to the (inter?)national holiday. Check out the ukelele + keyboard cuteness after the jump!

Twenty10, an Australian LGBT youth group, hoped to lend a helping hand and listening ear to attendees of the Rediscover the River Festival in Parramatta, New South Wales. But after festival organizers noticed the gay-positive signage Twenty10's plan to support LGBT-youth were squashed. 

Just in case you don't stay up until the wee hours of the morn hoping to get a glimpse of handsome athletes ripping off their clothes…well, that's why you've got us.

Those Aussies have got summer right now and the Australian Open, and while we're usually doing other things at 3:30 a.m. (don't ask what), we did take it all in as one handsome winner was up to his usual shirtless celebrations.

Big news from Down Under where scientists at the Queensland Institute of Medical Research announce a breakthrough that could become a cure for AIDS. Details follow. 

We were disconsolate when Matthew Mitcham threatened to retire from the world of Olympic diving after the London Games. But our M-A-C-glossed frowns were turned upside down today when we learned that the Aussie hottie has parlayed his experience (and Olympic-carved body) into another fruitful career. Thanks to this new campaign from Funky Trunks, we don't have to pour a beer a glass of Veuve on the diving board in honor of Matthew; it looks like he's on to bigger (just check out his underwear modeling assets!) and better (at least for our lingering eyes) things in the years ahead. 

Check out more of our Hump Day Hottie in his new Funky Trunks campaign after the jump!

In his just released memoir Twists & Turns, Matthew Mitcham comes clean about an addiction to crystal meth that he developed in the years between winning gold in 2008 at the Beijing Olympics and this year's London Games. 

Not to be left out of the marriage equality hoopla taking over America, Australia celebrated same-sex marriage in their own way this week when Big Brother winner Benjamin Norris proposed to his boyfriend on live TV during the show's finale.