It's only the first day of filming and things are already looking dramatic at the revamped The X-Factor! 

The global military obsession of the new millennium might not be, as previously thought, Libya or Afghanistan, but instead lip-dubbing Britney Spears. The latest to tackle "Hold It Against Me" is the sanitary division of the Swiss Army, which has gone all 90s boy band by naming itself the SanBoys.

Take this with a few extra grains of salt rimming your morning-time margarita, but a track reported to be "Hold It Against Me" featuring Britney's vocals before autotune has leaked to the Internet... and you might be shocked by what you hear!

Follow the jump to check out what Brit Brit sounds like before the Ke$ha Tool is applied to her vocals in Garage Band. 

The community has been expecting lots of big gay news today (a vote on marriage equality in New York is one of them), but certainly NOT news that Miz Britney Spears sang live vocals last night at the opening of her Femme Fatale tour in Sacramento! Follow the jump to watch video of Brit Brit performing "Hold It Against Me" with her alleged real-time vocal chords and sound-off in the comments if you think the shocking accusations are true!

Femme Fatale, which critics across the board are touting as Britney's comeback album, is released today, and to celebrate, Brit Brit's Castro concert aired in all its edited glory this morning on Good Morning America. Follow the jump to watch.   

Updated Thursday at 12:30 p.m. (PST):

Another Britney post today?! At this rate, there's really going to be nothing else for any other magazine to report...

You've had some time to let the drag-stravaganza that is the music video for "Hold It Against Me" from Britney Spears to simmer, so now it's time to dish, dolls. Jonas Akerlund, the director of this video as well as Lady Gaga/Beyonce's "Telephone," pulled out all the tricks -- and tight corsets -- here to make Miss Britney shine. So, Instincters, are you feeling it or will you hold this music video against Britney Spears?

Move over 12 gays of Christmas and Keith Olbermann (oh wait...), we have a new favorite countdown: The 14 days until Britney's "Hold It Against Me" music video premieres! Our Lady of Cheetos just announced the countdown on Twitter, and revealed that a super-short teaser video will be published on YouTube every day until it reaches fever pitch in two weeks when the full Jonas-Akerlund-directed music video for "HIAM" is released!

And man, the guys we send pics to on Grindr claim we're real good teases, but this inaugural video from Britney puts even our teasing skills to shame, so don't set your hopes too high...

We know that we all like rimming our morning-time margaritas with huge grains of salt, but lets add an extra dash to go along with this story, however believable it actually sounds. 

TMZ is reporting that momma Britney Spears's special diet of Cheeto's, McDonald's and trenti-sized iced mochas has left her dance-forged body less than nimble on the set of the music video for "Hold It Against Me." Supposedly the bitch can't keep up with the assigned choreography, so the record label has hired a body double to film Brit Brit's fancy legwork. 

"Multiple sources on the music video set tell TMZ, Jonas Akerlund, the director, was upset that Britney hadn't practiced enough...

It's no secret that this blog is a huge fan of Ryan James Yezak's music video "parodies" (though a better word might be "re-imaginations"). For his latest, RJY once again jumps the shark by releasing his version of a music video before the actual artist's premieres (think Peacock). Breathing silver-spray-painted life into "Hold It Against Me," (Britney's chart-destroying dubstep single), RJY adds some new elements...

Last week it was reported that director-of-the-moment Jonas Akerlund (Lady Gaga's "Telephone") would be the man responsible to bring Britney's No. 1 smash "Hold It Against Me" to life in video form. Well, according to Britney's publicist (a.k.a Twitter), shooting started yesterday and the video will be her best yet. 

"Day 1 of the HIAM shoot with Jonas. Such an incredible experience. I think this will be one of the best videos I have ever done. -Brit"

Today, for the second day of shooting, Britney tweeted a sneak peek of the video, as seen above. 

What I've been getting from word-of-mouth reports out and about (even from Britney die-hards) is that most in the gay community are disappointed with "Hold It Against Me." So for ...

Proof that you can have a bad weave and still rule the world...

Britney's new song, "Hold It Against Me," is apparently #1 in every country with Internet access. I'm still holding it against her for not putting out a better first track, though...