Kudos to the marketing team behind Kraft Zesty Italian's new ads, because we can't get salad dressing off our dirty minds! Or is it Anderson Davis we can't get off our minds? Or do we just want to pour salad dressing all over him?

Whatever the case, check out this pretty cheeky new ad campaign, after the jump!

United Colors of Beneton's inclusive principles has long been an overused punchline, but we're glad to see the jokes haven't deterred the iconic fashion house from pioneering acceptance in the fashion world.

So, a big round of applause goes to the United Colors of Beneton for giving a major role to Brazilian/Italian trans model Lea T in the label's s/s 2013 campaign. Check out Lea's first inspirational promo video as a brand ambassador for Beneton after the break. 

Like us after two or three wine coolers, the lazy punchline awarded by Italian handball player Ivan Stuffer's recent on-court "nutjob" is too easy. (And yes, his last name really is "stuffer".) 

Following a bit of gay panic during a recent match, the Briskena player dropped his shorts to gave his package an aggressive shake. This all was caught on video of course, which you can examine after the jump!

Updated Friday, 12:10 p.m. EST

Italian footballer Antonio Cassano has been handed down a €15,000 fine for saying that hoped his championship team included no gay players. Details follow. 

While we wish that some sort of black magic existed that'd make our Facebook profile pics take the burden of aging off our gorgeous visages and while we continue to save for a Cher-approved fetal-stem-cell sleeping chamber from HSN, at least we have the long-awaited U.S. DVD arrival of the classic Italian film, The Secret Of Dorian Gray, to keep our good eye distracted with vanity.

(Follow the jump to keep your good eye distracted with this week's Swag Suite giveaway!)

I don't know if I'm envious or disgusted that an Italian TV personality grabbed a shocked David Beckham's crotch, without even buying him a drink or seven first!

The basket-burglar was conducting research for his show to test the theory of Beckham's schlong size, as hypothesized by those hot Armani underwear billboards.

According to The Telegraph:

The stunt was a 'test' to see whether the football star measured up to his photo in Armani billboards, in which he shows off his impressive physique in a pair of tight-fitting underpants. He has since been replaced in the Armani campaign by Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo. Beckham looked shocked and immediately backed away after being touched by the blonde-haired TV reporter, a star of...

The new Italian Vogue has a preview of the spring/summer Dolce & Gabbana campaign featuring Madonna. Though the First Lady of Gays is busting out (literally), the images and styling seems a bit subdued for the star.

What do you think of the new ad campaign?