The gayttention span, a distinctly different scientific phenomenon than the run-of-the-mill attention span, is fickle and needy. It's accustomed to regular distraction from Googling Joe Manganiello every four minutes, being able to find at least one incarnation of Real Housewives on cable at any given moment and actively plotting the re-Feng-Shui-ing of living quarters with brain power reserves, to say the least. But with Miss Hurricane Irene expected to aggressively blow on more men across the Northeast than Lady Bunny, the population's power, fresh water and phone services are at risk of cutting out for...