Snooki's debut novel A Shore Thing comes out tomorrow. In case you can't decide if you're going to risk a few visits to the free clinic by exposing your eyeballs to it, publishers have released a few sneak-peek entries that should leave you convinced, including: 

"Gia [Snooki's Christian name] danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky."

Then there's this masterful literary construction: 

"He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face." 

The final nail in print publishing's...

A master of media manipulation if anything else, over the holiday weekend Lady Gaga released a butt-load of new Born This Way details, including a scandalous promotional picture that is as heavy on airbrushing as it is on unicorns.

Along with the sneak peek at Our Lady of Gaga's backside came word that her new album will be released on May 23, with its lead single premiering February 13. With Britney's lead single expected later this month and new album a few months away, who do you think will win over gays this year? A revamped Brit Brit or "the greatest album of a generation" from Lady Gaga?

If you thought the dark rooms at Splash or the Mayan were the places to ring in 2011, you might have been wrong -- with Coldplay's Chris Martin on piano, Beyonce wooed audiences with a gorgeous and intimate rendition of "Halo" on New Year's Eve at the Cosmopolitan Hotel in Vegas. 

DJ Earworm's annual mash-up of the Top 25 Billboard pop smashes has finally arrived. When all the songs are smooshed together like this, it's easier to hear just how prolific auto-tune has become. Still, a masterpiece. (Be sure to check out Instinct's Best of 2010 features here, and stay tuned for a new Top 10 list later this afternoon!)

"Hold It Against Me" is confirmed as the tongue-in-booty-cheek lead single from Britney's highly-anticipated new album, but these just-leaked lyrics are not. Still, while they remain unofficial and should be read with huge grains of salt rimming your morning margarita, the style, sluttyness and syntax all point to Brit-Brit. 

Hey over there
Please forgive me
I’m gonna have some fun tonight
And ain’t that how it should be?

Dancing to my favorite song
All by myself (Loving myself)

And ain’t that how it should be?

Baby, you can hold it against me
But tonight, I’m out on my own
You think I dress to impress them
But tonight, I’m doin’ it for myself

Hold it against me (Just do it)
Hold it against me (Boy, just do it)
Hold it against...

Earlier this month we learned that Born This Way will be the greatest album of a generation. Now, Lady Gaga, the supplier of that bold endorsement, has revealed more about your new favorite unreleased album in an interview with the BBC.

Born This Way will be 'more poetic' than Fame Monster. 

"I think that lyrically this album is more poetic," Lady Gaga told the U.K. journalists. "It's kind of like the post-operative stage of the album. I've already done the full heart surgery. I'm just sewing myself back up again."

Born This Way is crowdsourced. 

"It's really written by the fans, they really wrote it for me because every night they're funnelling so much into me," she added. "So I wrote it for them. Born This Way is all ...

Sure, his music helped him make his initial pop culture splash in the 90s, but it was his hunk, rhythmic hips that seared him in our brain organs. Luckily, Latin heartthrob Ricky Martin returns to both the music and the hips in the just-released cover art for Musica Alma Sexo.

The tats, the tank and the tris all have me wondering if Papi is Spanish for DILF!

She's been under the radar the past few years, but American Idol golden girl Kelly Clarkson debuted a new song at a charity event in Nashville over the weekend titled "You Still Won't Know What It's Like." All we know is that we still have love for Kelly's powerhouse vocals and hope that her new album -- anticipated in early 2011 -- is still on track for release.

What do you think of the new Kelly?

With all the Ke$ha's, Bravo Housewives and boy toys releasing underwhelming pop/dance music, this Facebook status update by Madonna is certainly welcome (and exhilarating) news!

"Its official! I need to move. I need to sweat. I need to make new music! Music I can dance to. I'm on the look out for the maddest, sickest, most bad ass people to collaborate with. I'm just saying...... - Madonna"

It's like an early Christmas present to the gays! 

Ke$ha!

The blogosphere cried foul when Ke$ha was snubbed by the Recording Academy earlier this month, walking away from dominating 2010 without a single Grammy nomination.

Whether you're a fan or not, the great dolla-signed one was one of the top-selling and highest-charting artists of 2010. Though she got no Grammy lovin',  perhaps she'll find some $olace in assuming a title that went to Lady Gaga in 2009: Last.fm's Best Artist of the Year. Regardless of her critical reception, 2010 was Ke$ha's year, apparent in her rise to Lastfm's most-played list with a whopping 15,915,151 "scrobbles."  

It's obvious she has a huge fan base (including a disproportionately large homo-base), but what does Ke$ha have to do to be taken seriou...

Last night's Mariah Carey Christmas Special was a train-wreck of epic holiday proportions, largely due to lazy, comical choreography, odd camera voodoo and trickery designed to slim the pregnant diva, and a dozen or so mentions of her new Xmas album, Merry Christmas II You (halfway through the broadcast I decided to start a drinking game based around the plugs). From the get-go it was clear that the special was largely about one thing: the Christmas spirit Miss Diva Mariah Carey.

Before you think I'm hating on some MiMi (I'll admit to having her holiday album on constant repeat on my iPod), check out a highlight from the special when Mariah performed on stage with her jaw-droppingly talented (in the classical sense) mom, Patricia Carey. Some...

Who is the only female artist to score three No. 1 hits from the same album in the past decade? 

Britney? Nope.

Lady Gaga? Surprisingly, no!

It's Katy Perry, who this week finds her third No. 1 single from Teenage Dream on the Billboard Hot 100 with "Firework." The track's ascension follows the top placing "Teenage Dream" and "California Gurlz" to award Katy Perry with the prestigious distinction of being the only female artist in the past 11 years to score three number one hits from one album.

Kudos, Katy!