We've pretty much only been watching E! widely-panned What Would Ryan Lochte Do for the eye-candy. So you can imagine our pleasure this week when our dedicated-yet-mindless hours of viewership paid dividends in a quick bedroom scene featuring the newest star of the reality show, Ryan's seemingly large, ahem, excitement. 

Check out the borderline NSFW screenshot after the break.

Ryan Lochte strips down for Cosmo [PITNB]

After debuting at SXSW, I Am Divine gets its first fierce trailer [OMGBlog]

More links after the break!

While we may have cringed a bit watching Ryan Lochte get objectified on E!'s Fashion Police, he didn't seem to mind, so why the hell are we complaining?

Joan Rivers had her way with the Olympian and promptly had him stripped down to his skivvies! (Well, his speedo.)

That's when things got weird. Or weirder. 

See for yourself after the jump!

Thank Gaga Ryan Lochte has that whole swimming thing going for him. Now we're not saying he isn't pretty to look at while shirtless on the set of 90210, we're simply saying he's a terrible, horrific, hide yo' kids kind of actor. He makes Snooki seem like she's on a Meryl Streep level of thespianism, he's that Razzie-worthy. But, ABS! (Follow the jump for a sneak peek at Ryan's acting debut.)

U.S. Olympic gold medalist Ryan Lochte's hilarious mom, Ike, had the interwebs all-a-twitter when she dropped the bomb that her son, one of our reigning wet dreams (he's a SWIMMER, folks) is only into one-night stands.

She explained, “He goes out on one-night stands. He’s not able to give fully to a relationship because he’s always on the go.”

For those of us that view Lochte in a "one time/anytime (anywhere)" light, the news was met with amusement and full-fledged hope! Ryan, however is now clearing the air. 

See what he thinks of his mom's comments after the jump.

Updated Thursday, 2:15 p.m. EST with new pics!

A new meme has popped up that we're totally not sick of yet! In fact, keep it coming, Internet! 

Inspired by yesterday's clever placement of a graphics bar over British diver Tom Daley's fun zone (above pic), TV viewers around the world have paused their DVR's just at the right time, begging the world to ask: Summer Olympics or gay porn? Summer Olympics pics that shouldn't be NSFW but are because of their steamy suggestiveness, after the jump!