Comedian Guy Branum (who we totally miss as a member of Chelsea Lately's roundtable) made his return to television last night on FX's Totally Biased with W. Kamau Bell and it was a thing of beauty.

Guy, a NorCal native, unleashed on the homophobic members of the San Francisco 49ers and it's not to be missed!

These homophobes have messed with the wrong gay.

Watch after the jump!

OWN aired Lisa Ling's interview with Exodus International head Alan Chambers on Tuesday night, who explained that he isn't gay, straight or even ex-gay anymore—he's now just Leslie-sexual. The truth comes out of the closet after the jump. 

The contract terms have reached their expiration!

After five years of blissful, couch-jumping marriage, Tom Cruise is shaving off Katie Holmes as the A-List couple reveals plans to divorce. Details follow. 

Father Martin McVeigh, the Irish priest who accidentally played gay porn during a slide-show for parents of Catholic schoolchildren, is the victim of a suspiciously convenient theft. Details follow. 

It was not the body of Christ that children preparing for their First Communion were subjected to after a Power Point presentation by an Irish priest, but rather the bodies of gay porn stars. Details follow. 

Updated Thursday, 1:50 p.m. (PST)

Last week we reported that Washington state was a mere four votes shy of having the needed senate support for marriage equality. MyNorthwest.com recently reported that number has dropped to a mere one vote after Sen. Jim Kastama, a conservative democrat who had previously opposed same-sex marriage, announced his departure from the dark side, making him number 24 in the Senate to commit to support same-sex couples.

With the endorsement of numerous businesses, including Microsoft Corp, (we knew we loved you, Bill), as well as Gov. Chris Gregoire, we can almost hear the gay wedding bells now.

Original Story after the jump.