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Written by Mike Wood
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Wednesday, 11 April 2007 |
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These are my predictions for the bottom three on tonight's American Idol.
HALEY SCARNATO
CHRIS RICHARDSON
PHIL STACEY
Here’s what I’m thinking :
Haley’s shorts were just a little too…short. But the salivating tween boys love it. She’ll be in the bottom three, but she’ll stay another week.
Sanjaya’s voice wasn’t all that bad. And that Blake is super-cute. Therefore, the bland boy band-member-in-the-making Chris will meet the chopping block, but survive.
His voice is strong, but Nosferatu (aka Phil Stacey) is just kinda creepy-looking. Sorry. I see a big BOOT in his very near future. Like, um, tonight.
What do you guys think?
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Written by Mike Wood
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Friday, 06 April 2007 |
Enough already.
Last night NBC did their whole super-sized episode horse crap thing so that every episode of every show on their primetime schedule started and ended at some stupid, fake time like 8:34 or 9:17. We couldn’t even get our Grey’s on amidst the confusion! Good thing it was a repeat!
This whole trick they’ve developed where a show starts at 8:58 and goes until 10:03 for an extra few morose minutes on House or a really desperate Desperate Housewives is beginning to bug me and my TV-addicted friends.
So let’s tell ‘em we ain't having it. We’ll concoct a letter something like this:
Dear Execs,
I get that your market share is shrinking and that your need to sell ad time is high, but you’re starting to really make my blood boil (Don’t make Mikey angry—just ask the interns!) I used to be able to watch a TV show that started at a real time like 9pm and then start another show at 9:30. With the advent of TiVo and other DVR technology, I’ve been able, until recently, to record my favorite shows with no hiccups. But now my DVR is regularly cutting off the last minute or two of every show because of this dumb-but-clever time gimmick/scheme. I don’t want to watch the last 12 minutes of anything. I want to watch the whole show. I want a show to begin and end when a show should; on the hour or half hour. So please, stop. Think of the children.
Are you with me, peeps?
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Written by Mike Wood
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Thursday, 05 April 2007 |
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She's hot. Period. The
end.
Of course, I jest. While
I do think she has smokin' legs, I am not as shallow as Simon. Well, maybe I
am…but not when it comes to women. Plus, I'm a gay man, so I can see beyond her
hotness. Barely.
Yes, she may have been
bland as oatmeal a month or so a go, but then—out of nowhere—I was like, “Who
is this girl? Where did she come from? Was she always in the Top 10?” Simon got
it right then, too, when he forgot her name.
But then there was that
week when the stylists took over and they worked the girl’s natural beauty to
her advantage. Then, along with her voice, people took notice. It seemed on
that very night, the stars aligned and her voice caught up with her wardrobe,
and yes, oh yes, those legs.
She may not have the pipes
of a Melinda Do-gooder, but Haley can sing sexy and salty, yet still have a fun
“everyday” innocence about her.
While the straight males
oogle her hooters, I’ll admire Haley’s hotness. So, Haley is MY new dark horse—plus,
she’s got way better hair than Sanjaya!
Beat me up, berate me, but I’m speed dialing, and re-speed
dialing next Tuesday! Join me!
She deserves
out of that dreaded BOTTOM THREE!
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