Ever wish you could retreat into the woods and be one with nature? Or maybe trade in the hustle and bustle of the busy city for the peace and quiet of being in the wild? Well, this week’s Instinct Hottie did just that–which is just one of the things that makes him so sexy. Lorenzo Buffa is your dream mountain man, a 35-year-old lumberjack living out his queer wilderness dreams in Pennsylvania. Known to those who follow him as Cabinfruit, Buffa creates content that captures his daily life as he chops, builds, and creates the ultimate haven for a hermit on the hill. He has amassed almost 1 million followers on TikTok with his entertaining DIY posts and reflections on cabin life.
Buffa isn’t just a scruffy dreamboat doing DIY in the outdoors, he’s also an advocate for mental health awareness as he himself is open and honest about doing the work on his own mental health.
It’s Buffa’s adorable face and ability to fill a hole that make him this week’s Instinct Hottie. His candidness with his emotions helps a little, too!
Let’s get to know Lorenzo Buffa (Cabinfruit) a little more:
INSTINCT: Why did you decide to move to the woods?
LORENZO BUFFA: I hit the lowest point in my life and I realized I needed a big change so I could experience big change. The long and short of it – I never processed a lot of things throughout my life, often putting energy into being a workaholic, which leads to both burn out but the potential for compounded grief and trauma. Just before the pandemic a life I loved and built up over many many years just crumbled. Then, the pandemic and solitude made everything more intense. I am here to save myself through hard work, internal and external. A mental health journey of sorts where only recently I decided 450+ days in… that I’m going to let go of pressure to triumph, heal, win… and instead sit with and be fine with being just fine.
INSTINCT: How did you learn to do so much manual labor?
LB: I’ve always been interested in building and making. Eventually I studied product design and got used to equipment to make prototypes, experiments, etc. Really tho, I just love learning and throwing myself into whatever I envision. There’s also a YouTube for basically everything ever, and I promise you I watched chainsaw safety videos over and over!
INSTINCT: What has been the biggest challenge since moving to the woods?
LB: Probably, honestly, not beating myself up for not being where I want to be yet emotionally and relationally with others. I’ve always known a lot of people, but kept few people close, so visitors have been very rare. It’s very lonely but also amazing. Hard but soft.
INSTINCT: Do you ever get lonely? If so, what do you do?
LB: I do get lonely. All the time. Maybe that’s why posting videos online or documenting this has felt natural for me. Aside from always being a documentarian in my life in general, I think I feel a bit more connected to the world and others this way. I have some trust issues and self love I need to work through before I can really focus on connecting with others again.
@cabinfruit The mash up no one wanted but was maybe worth it for the right people to see. No one cries beautifully when deeply aching. No one wins in the trauma olympics. Everyone gets a participation ribbon but you can do whatever you want with it. Your hurt is valid regardless of how you compare it to others. You can display your ribbon proudly or turn it into a calling or turn it into a real big feels video like this one… but please know you don’t have to wear that ribbon proudly, you don’t have to turn it into some notion of success, you can let go of pressure that hard times are supposed to be reflected back upon with grace and appreciation because they got you to some better place. Sometimes you just go to a new place. Some people think they work well under pressure but most don’t. It’s perfectly fine to land at being fine. Just knowing that you are in the race is enough and that you don’t have to win. We are called the human race not the human win, and feeling deeply and profoundly is a reminder that you are human and conscious and that really is enough. Go easy on yourself friend. Even this video and message is from someone who is currently working THROUGH it for a very long while now is trying hard to take the pressure of bouncing back “better than ever” off himself. I guess some might call this radical acceptance. I don’t know though because after a solid year of every self help book and podcast and academic paper I could devour on the brain, trauma, psychology, etc. I got tired of failing to meet the self imposed pressure of recovery from those books. Life is hard and messy. It would be great if some book or motivational speaker just… became this thing that fixed my challenges for me but sometimes we set the bar too high and I guess I am just too complex and intricate for that and frankly you might be too – and it’s not a bad thing. Look at flowers or snowflakes or chemistry or blood vessels or the brain… life itself is intricate and that’s okay, we need not fear the complex nor should we reduce it to something simple. I love you friend. #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthmatters #recovery #healing #trauma #cptsd
INSTINCT: What brings you joy?
LB: My animals! I have a dog and two cats and just recently a sick cat showed up and I’ve been taking care of him. He follows me around outside!
@cabinfruit Soothing or creepy?
INSTINCT: What do you think is the most attractive part about yourself?
LB: I’d have to say charisma, but that’s also what gets me in trouble!
INSTINCT: What do you find you are complimented on the most?
LB: I’d have to say my creativity and design. It’s a compulsion really.
INSTINCT: What, to you, defines sexy?
LB: I really like dichotomies in a person. Butch and femme, strong but soft, proud but modest. I’ve always been attracted to Woody Harrelson – he’s both rugged & playful. Him having no hair and that gap in his teeth… 🤤
INSTINCT: What is your proudest moment in your life thus far?
LB: A number of years ago I had a whole life as a product designer. I designed watches and the day I got confirmation from MoMA Design Store they would introduce my very first solo product, a wooden watch. I’d have to say my professional and design dreams came true. I will always be proud of that because my work has always aimed to incorporate nature into the everyday and my aesthetic heavily relies on letting natural material shine.
INSTINCT: What haven’t you accomplished, personally or professionally, that you are wanting to do in the next 2-3 years?
LB: Professionally I’d like to evolve Cabinfruit into something with more impact. Some things are in the works but I am moving slow. Personally, I’d like to get on track in terms of getting my self esteem and anxiety in check so I can try to get back on track when it comes to dating, future family goals, etc. I’ve always wanted to be a dad but if that were to ever happen for me I’d need an actual dating life! It’s rough out here!
INSTINCT: Have you found love? If so, what is the best part of your relationship and what do you love most in your partner(s)?
LB: I have found love in my life and I’ve found the loss that comes with it. I’ve never been a serial relationship type guy, but I do shine best when I have close relationships and exist in a way that is interdependent with others.
Rapid fire question time:
- What is your all-time favorite movie?
- Best in Show
- Who is your biggest celebrity crush?
- Post Malone 😂 ❤️
- What is your favorite cheat meal or snack?
- Nutella
- Favorite position?
- Back left of dance floor with enough room to actually dance freely
- If you were stuck on an island for eternity, what music album would you want to have with you?
- Dolly Parton’s Greatest Hits
INSTINCT: What does it mean to be featured as our Instinct Hottie?
LB: One step closer to the lumberJack of my dreams throwing me over his shoulder and running me deeper into the woods.
@cabinfruit
INSTINCT: Anything else you’d like to share with the Instinct readers?
LB: I just want anyone reading this to know that they are valuable and important. If you are having a hard time I want you to know that intense emotional energy is something we channel. Subconsciously we so often use it poorly, but with some intention we can try to leverage it to improve ourselves or our situation. You owe it to yourself to at least try. Xo ❤️
Follow Lorenzo Buffa (Cabinfruit) on Instagram and TikTok for your daily dose of mountain man wood and ethereal wilderness energy.
I think I’m in love 🤤
Gay hottie of the week is probably my favorite part of Instinct although I love the gay coming out stories a lot too, well most of the site I like 🙂