New Poll Says 3/4ths Gay Men Are Turned Off By Feminine Men

The results on a new survey based on Masculinity that was published by Attitude Magazine were so majorly against femininity that it shocked the staff.


The survey found that gay men with feminine qualities were considered unappealing by almost three quarters of respondents.

More specifically, the results found that 71% of the 5,000 respondents said they were turned off by potential partners with typically feminine attributes.

The survey also asked, ‘Have you ever thought that effeminate gay men give the gay community a bad image or reputation?”

The results for that question ended up as 41% in the Yes column.





اتبكون على شيئا مضى؟ اقسم لكم لو كان خيرا لبقى.

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Matt Cain, the Editor-in-chief of Attitude Magazine commented on these results and said that they were “troubling.”

“It backs up the experience so many of us have had on hook-up apps or the dating scene. And it reflects the difficult relationship so many of us have with our masculinity.”

“But why should we let expectations about how we should look or act as men make us feel bad about ourselves?”

Keep in mind that Attitude started this survey as a part of their mission to tackle attitudes towards masculinity in the gay community.

That bias could have directly affected the result of the survey in the vein of questions worded to make one answer seem more offensive or wrong than another one. (Though doing so clearly didn't affect the results going in the other favor).

38 thoughts on “New Poll Says 3/4ths Gay Men Are Turned Off By Feminine Men”

  1. I wonder if they did a survey of heterosexual women how many of them would be attracted to feminine men? I’m betting the numbers are even more telling. Does that make them misogynistic?

  2. I believe we must protect

    I believe we must protect everyone in the community, not those who are represented in advertising campaigns only. If a person is being themselves it is actually fascinating and awesome, I believe we are LGBTQ because we have a common story and common goal, being ourselves and finding someone who cares for you equally. This is a shallow hypothesis.

  3. The survey reflects LGBT’s

    The survey reflects LGBT's fallacy of falling prey to the social programming of gender is binary and thus labeling what doesn't reflect the socially accepted affectations and gestures for a gender as being "the opposite".  Societal programming that began with the Victorian and Edwardian sensibilities toward the proper duties for a man, and a woman, in the emerging cosmopolitan and industrial societies, and additional dumping of duties onto both genders after World War II.

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  5. I prefer masculine men. I try

    I prefer masculine men. I try to behave in a relaxed and confident way, and not act like I'm putting on a performance for everyone. Still, it's adorable when a hot guy gets a little swishy while flirting after a couple cocktails. 

  6. I think living in a

    I think living in a heterosexualized world where representation of homosexual attraction is literally null some gay boys will express their attraction in a feminized manner by learning from women who are the closest example they have regarding how to communicate their romantic and sexual desires for men.

    Girls at a very young age learn from women the intricacies and seductive ways to attract men and how to express that desire socially; eventually some gay boys do the same thing taking the same example from women. Usually gay guys who are bottoms and take the subordinate role.

    When I was younger an just discovering gay porn I always assumed being a bottom demanded being feminine or was lined to femininity since my only example was heterosexuality, but later when I saw many bottoms in gay porn have a masculine demeanor I understood homosexuality is not heterosexuality and you can a bottom, subordinate and masculine, but I never got the example, form the real world before.


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  8. Hot looking Alpha males will

    Hot looking Alpha males will always top the list of all time fantasies. Nelly queens naturally are at the bottom of the list. Takes all kinds to make up a collage, probably best one accepts their fate and get on with it. 

  9. Why is it bad, for me as a

    Why is it bad, for me as a gay man, to Only be attracted to masculine guys? I'm a man that wants another man, not a woman. If I wanted a man that acts feminine or has overtly feminine traits or habits, then I'd be with a woman. I'm not attracted at all to women in any way, shape, or form. So why would I want any of those traits in a man if they are a complete and utter turn-off? I don't see why that's viewed as hurtful or wrong or being negative. It all comes down to attraction. I'm also not attracted to guys claiming to be gender queer, non-binary, fluid, or any of that nonsense. I'm a man that wants a man, not something-like-a-man.


  10. What I would say is that gay

    What I would say is that gay men are not attracted to men who seem to put an effort into looking and behaving like a woman. Our personalities give information about ourselves to others. Wearing makeup like a woman does a if trying to hide your natural male traits, wearing women's clothes, walking around in a seductive way as if you were in a pop diva's music video as if you had a woman's pelvic structure, etc makes you look like you desire to be read as and be treated like a woman or that you want to assume the role of a woman socially. Consciously or subconsciously gay men read those signs and will not feel attraction to that.

    And then you have a fraction who are bitchy, obnoxious, overly dramatic, histrionic as if they were playing a character. People are not attracted to unbalanced loud personalities.

    In the same way, men who try to project a hyper masculine personality are equally a turnoff, invasive and uncomfortable to be with.

    It's not femininity itself, but how far that display of femininity seems to hide your nature as a male…



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  12. Agreed it’s the gay elite

    Agreed it's the gay elite thinking to shame us or make us be politically correct and many of us and I'd suggest from this survey (tho I certain it was slightly skewed) still demonstrates enough of us are sick of the PC agenda and telling us what we 'should like' and how 'inclusive' we must be. It's a personal choice. I like masculine men, if I wanted a purse to fall out when they open their mouth, I'd date a women. I like men because they are MEN. The majority of my gay friends are the same, we have had this discussion un-skewed and It sits about 70 to 80% preferring masculine gay men and matches closely with this survey, i.e. out of 10 gay friends 7 to 8 prefer masculine men, the other 3 to 4 had no preference to slight preference to put it in survey speak. I agree with many here that we are sick of the gay elite/intelliigentsia telling us what we should like or be….for all their talk of following your instinct, be who you are/authentic, they want us all to think as they do or you get shamed… so sad, I've never understood the need of gay men to affect a feminine voice, demeanor or look and whilst I take NO issue with drag queens and enjoy their performance, to me it is act, a show and not for every day living.

  13. There’s more than a little

    There's more than a little bit of irony that an e-magazine, whose banner states "Instinct: Follow yours…", would be so judgmental when gay men, in fact, do follow their instincts. Meh!

  14. This is nothing more than

    This is nothing more than preference shaming by some self appointed people who believe they have been put in charge of dictating to all gays the correct way to be gay. Too many LGBT+++ activists loosely use the term inclusive when what they're really trying to do is be intrusive. It's ridiculous to try and shame people into having preferences that don't come naturally to them and the tactic is no different than the mind bending that is attempted at gay conversion camps.





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  16. If feminine men talk about

    If feminine men talk about acceptance, why don't they start with their bodies….. B a man who u r born as.

    If u cannot accept that then no 1 else will….

    Beside if i need a lady in my bed it will b a lady not a ladyish boy…. With a over a ton of make up….

  17. Two bottoms don’t make a top!

    Two bottoms don’t make a top!! 

    Every one has a type.  We should all respect everyone’s decisions and keep our ugly opinions to ourselves. If it’s not something positive we want to say then don’t say it at all.  …..

  18. For me it’s simpler, I like

    For me it's simpler, I like neither too effeminate nor too masculine. Anyone with an obsession with themselves is a major turn off. Sorry, boys, I'm not impressed. Besides, you'd hate me, I have just one small mirror in my home. It's in the bathroom.

    I love the slim, nerdy middle, mostly for their intelligence. They don't have to do anything to enhance themselves. Their social awkwardness usually makes for more quiet evenings at home. Their intelligence makes for some highly imaginative bedroom fun.

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  20. This is very true and also

    This is very true and also hurtful , I physically look Muscular , but I am feminine in nature , my ex and I dated like for an Year and My ex said I am feminine and I should be Muscular with him, I dumped his ass right then , it was very hurtful also it got me thinking may Be I am a girl in a boys body and have started reading about transitioning to female .. Some time people don’t realize how there actions can effect on others . 

    • Acting feminine doesn’t make

      Acting feminine doesn't make you a woman so you should not alter your body just to find a partner. In real life not every man finds you or me attractive just like you are not attracted to every man on this Earth either. If it doesn't work with a partner it may work with other in the future. Whatever life presets to you, finding a partner is difficult for all human beings. Humans are difficult, complex intricate.

      Don't do things to your body for external validation that later you may regret.

  21. Hook up sites are usually for

    Hook up sites are usually for one night stands, so what a person prefers for these sites is not what we might choose for long term relationships. If I used a hook up site and could have anyone I want, he'd be about 6ft., slim but not skinny, muscular but not too muscular, with a bit of body hair. Falling in love has never been my fantasy but always the right person. When you meet "the one" so much more than appearance matters. 

  22. Or maybe this survey needed

    Or maybe this survey needed to ask different/better questions. You can find/create a survey to back whatever agenda you are trying to pass off as real information. I call bullshit. 

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  24. I wonder how many of these

    I wonder how many of these "men" who dont care for femininity shave their bodies down to their crotch, making themselves look like a nubile 10 year old. Maybe some are not attracted to femininity in men (I personally don't mind it in a friend, but I am not attracted to it in a lover) but I only wonder why so many are attracted to men whose bodies look little boys. And what of the "men" shaving their whole bodies, what is their reasoning?

  25. This is political correctness

    This is political correctness at it's absurd end. Nelly boys MUST make you horny, or you are a cretin ?

  26. I️ wonder how many of the men

    I️ wonder how many of the men who took the survey would be considered feminine. Probably around 3.7/4. Just something to think about. 

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  28. What a bunch of douchebags on

    What a bunch of douchebags on this thread. I’m not particularly attracted to femininity either, but that doesn’t mean people shouldn’t be who they are.  The world doesn’t revolve around you. This is the kind of intolerance the right wingers are always dishing out. Live and let live smdh 

  29. That is the reason I’m the

    That is the reason I’m the LGBT alphabet we are the letter G if we must have a label, if I wanted a female I would have or would choose so. Don’t get me started on Bisexual and Transgender they are a world of their own, I want a true man. Not surprised at this poll at all.

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  31. It’s interesting to see stats

    It's interesting to see stats on this. And I'm surprised the number who don't like feminine  traits in men is not higher. Being bisexual I have no time for gender bending, preferring women and men who act their gender. The rest is just strange drama that's a total put off. Then again, looking at the stats there is someone for everyone and that is a good thing. 

  32. Well, too bad that you find

    Well, too bad that you find it "troubling."  For far too long the overlords of the gay community have forced Drag Queens and Drag Shows and Gender Bending down our throats, causing most gay men to simply stay quiet and away – and we're not doing that anymore.  We're men, we're happy being men, and we are attracted to men.  What this survey proves, more than anything, is that the elite in the gay rights movement are completely out of touch with the majority of us, and have been for a long time.

    • I could have not said it

      I could have not said it better. If I want a woman I'd go after one. If a guy wants to be feminine so be it, just don't expect every guy they are attracted to to return the feeling.

    • Lol, no what it proves is

      Lol, no what it proves is that there are a lot of men who have delusions about the way they present and what it might mean. You are not in the majority, nor do you likely read to others the way you wish you did.

    • I agree with you partially. I

      I agree with you partially. I stayed in the closet far longer than I had to because the men that I was attracted to weren't visible in the gay community. They were there, but I didn't see them because of all the noise created by men in sequined thongs and in drag, waving rainbow flags. But today it's different. It's clear to the world that there are gay men of all types. And if I find effeminate men embarrassing, those are because of my internal demons. It's still important to stand in solidarity with other gay men. Even if we aren't attracted to them sexually. 

      • I appreciate that thought. It

        I appreciate that thought. It is tough dragging the internal conflict of SSA out from under the general social mapping of genders we get from womb to hormone surging teens.  That tough question of if I'm attracted to the same gender, does that make me 'womanly".  If I'm to be an "alpha male" am I expected to be grabbing and chasing everything in sight?  The ever-changing answer to "what does a man do?"  shoot guns?  chop wood?  wear lumberjack clothing?  fly jets?  fight wars?  sire children?  brew coffee?  never express emotionally?

        The answer for sanity sakes is either fall into a 'conservative' religious values-packed social model, or create your own internal answer that society can not alter despite its ever-changing demands on behavior and attitudes.

  33. We cannot choose the

    We cannot choose the attributes to which we are attracted.  I think a majority of gay men are attracted to masculinity because we are turned off (sexually) by women.  A man with the attributes of a woman would, therefore, be a turn-off as well.  I don't see anything surprising about this poll.


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