Scruffy Brit is Hottie of the Week

This week’s Instinct Hottie is a scruffy bloke from across the pond that is easy, REALLY easy, on the eyes. Ben Barton is a 40-year-old filmmaker from a small seaside town on the southern coast of the UK, Folkestone, about a 45 minute train ride from London.

David Goodson Photography

Barton is a daddy, an actual one, who co-parents his son Karl with his husband of over 20 years.


Being a dad doesn’t stop Barton from letting his freak flag fly, though. He loves to post some naughty and nice photos on social media and loves to give his followers a little something to pine for.

Let’s get to know Ben Barton a little more:

INSTINCT: How did you get into filmmaking? 

BEN BARTON: My Dad used to make films on super-8 when I was a kid. Not just home movies, but little creative short films. I appeared in those, and so I guess I’ve always loved cine film and that process. I started making super-8 movies of my own, then went on to a degree in film and TV. I now work as a full-time writer in the travel industry. I’m also a poet and have authored three poetry books. But I’ve always made films as well.  


INSTINCT: What is one of your favorite projects? 

BB: I guess I’m most proud of ‘Stella Erratica’, an art sci-fi film I wrote and directed which premiered at the Cannes Film Festival. It took me years to make, and back in 2015 when I started shooting I ended up getting some help from David Bowie. It was when he was making the video for ‘Blackstar’, and we shared props on both shoots. He died a few months later which was devastating. So it’s bittersweet, but that film did so much for my career. 


INSTINCT: What brings you joy? 

BB: Being with my friends and people that I love. A really good bottle of red wine. Learning something new from my son. Walking my pugs Leonard and Penelope. Swimming. Going to the cinema. Italian food. 

INSTINCT: What do you think is the most attractive part about yourself? 

BB: My sense of humor. It’s pretty dark and dry. I’ve used humor my whole life. Making people laugh really lifts me up, even when I’ve gone through some dark moments. Also my massive cock.  


INSTINCT: What do you find you are complimented on the most? 

BB: Definitely my eyes. I think it’s that dark hair and blue eyes combination. People like it. My eyebrows get an honorable mention but they are natural, I’ve never touched them. Also my massive cock. 


INSTINCT: What, to you, defines sexy? 

BB: A bit of mystery. I like it when someone doesn’t give everything away all at once. I’m quite loud and louche, so it’s the opposite of me really. Ying and Yang. 


INSTINCT: Have you found love? If so, what is the best part of your relationship and what do you love most in your partner(s)? 

BB: When I was 20, I met this guy called Scott in Pink Cadillacs, a tiny gay club that’s long gone now. At first I thought it was just going to be a one-night stand – I was going through a bit of a slutty phase after splitting up with my first major boyfriend. But we connected and started hanging out, and things just grew and grew from there. 20 years on and we’re still together, and still very much in love. Well I am anyway, you’ll have to ask Scott if he feels the same!  

Our relationship works because we are so different. I’m the loud one, he’s quieter and more of a thinker. But he has a calming effect on me, and although we are different we share a love of music and cinema. We go on lots of date nights. He’s such a kind, special person, always very nurturing. He lets me do my own thing when I’m off promoting a film, doing a poetry reading, or traveling around the world for work. When I do go away I miss him terribly, but it’s so good to come home to him and our life together. 


INSTINCT: What is your proudest moment in your life thus far? 

BB: Scott and I have married twice – the first time was shortly after Civil Partnerships were introduced in England in 2005. Then in 2014 Gay Marriage was introduced, so we did it again. We adopted our son soon after our first wedding – he’s 14 now. Being a gay dad and being visible for that makes me proud, and over the years we’ve been able to use our experience and to help other gay parents adopt. 


INSTINCT: How’s fatherhood? 

BB: I just can’t remember what life was like before we had Karl. If I have one regret, it’s not enjoying those little moments more back when he was a toddler. They really do grow up so fast. I’m just so proud of him and the man he is becoming.   


INSTINCT: What haven’t you accomplished, personally or professionally, that you are wanting to do in the next 2-3 years? 

BB: Making a feature film. I have so many ideas, and I was all set to start on a big project in 2020 – then Covid happened and basically the whole thing fizzled out. I want to get back to it, to make a longer film, and start touring film festivals again.  


Rapid fire question time:  

  • What is your all-time favorite movie? 
    • Brief Encounter. It’s an old classic but I could watch it every day. 
  • Who is your biggest celebrity crush? 
    • Ryan Gosling – I just love his lazy eye. I’m a sucker for a facial imperfection, or better still, a scar. That’s hot. 
  • What is your favorite cheat meal or snack? 
    • I’ve been vegetarian since I was 12, so basically anything with lentils or chickpeas. I pretty much live on them. 
  • Favorite position? 
    • In the ass. 
  • If you were stuck on an island for eternity, what music album would you want to have with you? 
    • The Immaculate Collection by Madonna.  

INSTINCT: What does it mean to be featured as our Instinct Hottie? 


BB: I’m a bigger guy, I don’t have a perfect body and I know I don’t look like your usual models. But now I’m 40 I really don’t give a fuck. I’m hot just the way I am and I’m happy to show it off.  

INSTINCT: Anything else you’d like to share with the Instinct readers? 

BB: My Instagram is basically just photos of me lying on my bed. I’m a selfie whore with a massive ego and it’s as simple as that. Give me a follow and I’ll show you. And perhaps my massive cock. 

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