Apparently, more than one half of gay men have cheated on a partner (or FS Magazine thinks so).
The Health Equality and Rights Organization (or HERO for short) and FS magazine conducted a survey that found that result. The survey, which was mostly focused on infidelity, asked 961 gay and bisexual men about their relationships.
The results found that 58% of respondents said their partner had cheated on them before. In addition, 52% said they’d cheated themselves before. Within that, 45% said their partner still doesn’t know and 61% said they’d continued the affair multiple times without informing their partner.
The questions also set up difficult conversations like what you could possibly bring home after cheating, such as contracting an STI. 17% of respondents said they had gotten HIV or some other STI from an affair.
This also isn’t just a problem for couples in more traditional relationships. 40% of respondents in open relationships said they or their partner had broken the rules of the relationship before.
Ian Howley, who’s the chief executive of HERO, reflected on these results and insisted that they show a need for more communication between gay couples, especially concerning sex.
“What’s clear to us from the results of the survey and what gay men told us about their experiences is that some gay men are making the same mistakes regarding communication, trust and boundaries.”
“There’s huge issue of gay men not being able to talk to one another about what they want sexually.”
He continued: “Of course sex is important for any relationship to work but you cannot and never will be able to meet the needs of someone 100% of the time. And we are foolish to put that pressure on ourselves.”
“If you are lucky to find someone that does it for you, is there for you emotionally, physically and treats you with the respect you deserve, then you must work on the relationship. Letting a relationship die because of sex is silly. More often he will work with you and you can work together to explore options that will keep your relationship tight.”
That said, let's not forget that this is one online poll. On top of that, the sample size is incredibly small. These results, while interesting, do not really reflect gay and bisexual men.
While the survey is interesting to talk about and start discussions, it isn't one to use as true representation of gay men. We'll leave that to an actual study (or a much larger survey at the least).
But, if you’re interested in checking out the issue of FS Magazine, you can download it for iOS, Android, or Kindle.