Hawthorn Recalls His Guilt For A Love That Wouldn’t Last

Rising country star Cameron Hawthorn (photo credit: Matthew Holler)
Rising country star Cameron Hawthorn (photo credit: Matthew Holler)

We’re thinking out country singer Cameron Hawthorn’s new single, “To Break Hers” is going to resonate with a lot of gay men.

The song and the music video take a pensive and deeply personal look at the heartache Hawthorn caused not only himself but a girl he dated before coming out.

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As many can attest, the closet doesn’t hurt just queer folks but the early loves who sadly become collateral damage as we work our way to discovering and embracing who we really are.

“Navigating dating is a difficult process in general, and I hate that when it doesn’t work out, someone usually gets hurt,” says Hawthorn about the new song. “For me, there was an added level of why it would never work out with this girl, and it wasn’t until coming out and looking back on the relationship and breakup that I was truly able to process it all.”

As an openly gay man myself, “To Break Hers” struck a nerve as I immediately traveled back in my mind to high school and the girl I dated but could never truly commit to.  

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Hawthorn recently told The Advocate, “When you break someone’s heart, you carry that with you.”

The handsome crooner adds that even while going through the motions of dating, to the point he traveled to the girlfriend’s hometown to meet her family, he knew “deep down that I would never be able to make it work.”

Hawthorn says he “needed to write this song” to help process and move past the guilt and hopes the track can serve as an apology to the girl and himself for the hurt he caused.

Drawing on influences from his idols like Johnny Cash, Elvis, and Fleetwood Mac, as well as more current artists like Shania Twain and Eric Church, the singer/songwriter delivers robust vocals and pop sensibility.

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Instinct chatted with the handsome crooner about the new single and more.


Instinct Magazine: As a gay man myself, “To Break Hers” completely took me back to those heartbreaking times before I fully knew myself. What inspired the song? 

Cameron Hawthorn: “To Break Hers” is a song I wrote with fellow Nashville artist Lena Stone. It’s about being in a relationship and knowing it’s not going to work out in the end because you were never in love. But instead of ending it, you continue down the path of the relationship. “Time does lots of damage” and I learned firsthand that time will eventually end in hurting the other person and yourself. 

IM: Your release “Dancing in the Living Room” went viral in an oh-so-romantic way touching on the intimacy of dancing with a loved one – something a lot of LGBTQ people either never or barely experience. Did you set out to show the world how universal these moments can be?

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CH: As an artist, I hope that people relate with my story and it’s important for me to write and sing about real life experiences like love in “Dancing in the Living Room” and heartbreak and remorse in “To Break Hers”.

>>>Related: Oh Hot Damn! Who Likes Dancing With A Sexy Cowboy?

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(image via Instagram)

IM: What do you do outside of music that contributes to your creativity?

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CH: I’m an avid music listener. I love finding inspiration from other music and I can even go down a YouTube hole when I find a song and find more inspiration around the song or maybe a live performance of it or the artist talking about it. Other artists really inspire me. I also love exploring new coffee shops or bars, meeting new people, and having good conversations with friends over a coffee or whiskey.

IM: What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?

CH: Don’t forget your roots and where you came from. 

IM: What’s next on the horizon? 

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CH: Before 2020 ends, I’m going to squeeze in releasing my EP that I had intentions of releasing much earlier in the year. I’m really looking forward to sharing even more new music and ending 2020 on a high note.


“To Break Hers” is available on all streaming/digital download sites now. Follow Cameron on Instagram here and on Facebook here.

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