Today, let’s deep dive into one of the most popular sex positions out there: the side sex position for gay sex.

What is the Side Sex Position?

There is no “official” definition for the Side Sex position, and its exact look will vary by who you ask. Some people consider the Side Sex Position to be another name for Spooning. Others think of this Sideways position like Spooning but with both partner’s knees pulled into their chests.

If you prefer a more classic from-behind setup (and easier depth control), doggy style is the obvious cousin to this.

Either way, all of those differences are minor. At its core, the Side Sex Position has both of you lying on your sides while having sex.

This position has some very fantastic benefits:

It’s comfortable. Lying on your side on the bed is probably one of the most comfortable positions to hold. Add in your favorite blankets and pillows, and this anal sex position can feel a bit like the world’s most comfortable sex position.

It’s marathon-ready. Nobody needs to do a plank or hold their body up. As long as you both are comfortable lying on your sides for long periods of time, the Side Sex gay sex position can go as long as you want.

It’s simple to understand. If you’d prefer not to get out an instruction manual for your sex position, this one is ready to go. Just lie next to one another, and let the obvious answer guide you from there.

It’s great for morning sex. Without face-to-face contact, you don’t have to worry as much about just-woke-up hair or breath. You two can enjoy one another while still half-asleep, skipping the quick “refresh” you might otherwise do in the morning.

How to Do the Side Sex Position

This gay sex position has each of you on your side. It’s an intuitive sex position for many, but if you want the instructions, we’re happy to point out the intricacies for you!

To get into the Side Position for gay sex:

• The bottom lies on their side wherever you’ll be having sex.
• The top lies behind the bottom, facing the bottom’s back.
• Either partner can now close the distance between your bodies as the top’s shaft slides into the bottom. When fully slid inside, both partners will have full skin-to-skin contact from shoulder to toes.

This is a position that doesn’t require much explanation – perfect for when you want something simple that still lets you have a great time.

This is also one of the most beginner-friendly layouts—if you’re new, bookmark our first time anal sex guide before you try it.

Fun Side Sex Position Variations

Loving the Side Position for gay sex? If you’re already a seasoned pro at this approachable sex position, you might be looking for ways to switch it up. If you’re ready for new sensations or a challenge, these fun side sex position variations offer that novelty you’re looking for.

The Corkscrew Sex Position

Simply by moving one person, the Corkscrew position changes the penetration angle by requiring the top to get on their knees. This downwards thrusting angle changes where the shaft hits and gives the top a much better vantage point of all of the action.

A Quick Tip: Some hamstring flexibility is required to achieve penetration here. Depending on your bottom’s hip width, the top may need to get really low to the ground to comfortably slide in. If their knees don’t spread far enough, you can elevate the bottom’s bum with some pillows or take this to the edge of the bed, having the top stand next to the bed to make it happen.

The Cross Position

The Cross Position starts off like the Side Sex position, but the bottom partner lies on their back instead of their side. This puts your bodies at a 90-degree angle, offering deeper penetration while still maintaining a lot of the benefits that make the Side Sex position so amazing.

A Quick Tip: If your bottom has powerful quads, this can be a great position for them to show off. With their legs planted firmly on the other side of the top, the bottom can lift their own lower body, taking control of the pace.

Binding Spoon

A very popular variation on the Side position for gay sex, the Binding Spoon has you both in the Side Sex position while the bottom raises their top-most leg into the air. That’s it! With the leg out of the way, the top can get deeper, instantly changing up penetration with a really minor swap.

A Quick Tip: Holding the leg in the air can get kinda tiring for the bottom. Luckily, as part of the charm of the Binding Spoon, the bottom can lower the leg to go back into the standard Side Sex position at any time. Play with raising and lowering it to swap up sensations and keep the bottom from getting distracted by quaking muscles!

If you want a twistier upgrade that still keeps things controlled, try the Pretzel Dip position.

Curled Spoon Side Sex Position

One of the easiest Side Sex Position variations to get into, the Curled Spoon simply has both of you bring your knees to your chests, curling around one another. While this dramatically limits how much movement either of you can facilitate, it rewards you with intimacy in a sex position that feels more like cuddling than fucking.

A Quick Tip: For thicc bottoms or smaller shafts, achieving penetration here may be difficult with the position change. Don’t be afraid to go back to the regular Side position for gay sex if this one isn’t working out.

Bonus Position: Daisy Chain

If you ever find yourself in a group sex situation, the Daisy Chain is a fantastic option. It’s just the Side Sex position – but with extra people added on! Since the traditional Side position for gay sex leaves the top’s butt and bottom’s penis open for business, you can easily add an additional partner on any side. Heck, you can add on 3 partners if you’re that lucky!

A Quick Tip: The partner in the middle is going to receive a LOT of pleasure! If you’d like to delay the inevitable a bit longer, make a conscious choice about who is going to be in the middle based on who has the longest staying power. It’s really hard to avoid shooting when you’re sandwiched in the middle of two hunks!

Side Position for Gay Sex: The Great Equalizer

We love the Side Sex position’s ability to make body type differences irrelevant. Because everyone gets to lie down, height differences don’t matter. While thicker and thinner body types can require modifications to enjoy deep penetration, it only requires a small shift of your angles instead of large, position-changing swaps. The same can be said for penis sizes; changing up the exact angle at which your bodies meet can work with a variety of penis lengths.

The Side Sex Position is also fantastic because of how simple it is. You just need a flat surface. That’s it. You don’t need any complicated sex furniture or to find a table that’s the perfect hip height for penetration. While we can’t say the Side Sex Position would be our first choice in a dirty warehouse floor, it’s technically possible to do it there, making it simple to enjoy this Spooning lookalike no matter where you are.

General Tips for the Best Side Position for Gay Sex

Before we get into how each individual can take charge of their own pleasure, let’s talk about ways the two of you can work together to make Side Sex feel different. We’re talking things like:

Choosing a softer surface. Since both of you are lying on your sides, your hip bones are going to make direct contact with the surface beneath you. Add in thrusting, and those hip bones are grinding into the ground below you. There’s a reason most people like to do this sex position on a soft mattress. (Too soft can make it difficult to move back and forth, though.)

Getting adventurous with pleasuring the bottom. One of the big benefits of this Side Sex Position is that everyone’s hands are free. The top or bottom can easily reach around and stroke off the bottom. As an added bonus, if you’re doing this position in the middle of the bed, there’s space for large strokers or other sex toys on the bottom. (If you’ve ever wanted to be sandwiched in the middle of a threesome, a sex doll could even fit pretty comfortably in front!)

Utilizing pillows to keep the Top’s arm awake. You know the stereotype: this sex position tends to put the top’s arm to sleep. Reduce distracting arm tingles by utilizing pillows. Prop up the bottom’s head on a pillow or two, reducing how much weight rests directly on the top’s arm.

If side sex feels too ‘cuddle-core’ and you want something with a bit more intensity, the Flatiron position is a fun next step.

Having everything within easy reach. While the Side Sex Position is easy to understand, it takes a bit of intertwining for everyone to get in place. Reduce having to re-pretzel yourself by keeping everything you both need within easy arm’s reach.

How the Giver Changes the Side Sex Position

Both of you have your individual parts to play in this erotic sex position. The top, as the movement provider in this one, has some easy ways to impact how sex feels for both of you:

Experiment with different angles of approach. Your “traditional” Side Sex position finds the top curled up against the bottom’s back with head-to-toe skin contact. This can work great for some gay couples! However, you might find that you better hit the prostate (or get deeper penetration) if you change up the angle. Instead of lying parallel with your partner, lie down with your chest away from your partner’s back while maintaining the hip contact, coming in with an “upward thrust” instead of a 90-degree angle. You’ll get less skin contact, but it might be the Side Sex Position modification that the two of you have needed.

Change how you thrust. Penetration can feel different for both of you with different hip movements. For the easiest thrusting, simply slide in and out. If you’re down for more of a workout, really activate your core, thrusting with more of a “scooping” motion, starting with your hips lower and ending with them higher at the end of the movement.

Use your inside voice – and make it sexy. Coming in from behind, you’re likely to be curled up right next to your bottom’s ear. Be cognizant of how loud you’re being, and take advantage of this closeness to whisper your dirtiest thoughts right in their ear.

How the Receiver Changes the Side Sex Position

“Receiving” doesn’t have to mean passive! While the Side Position for gay sex does leave the bottom feeling a little more passive than in other sex positions, there are still a few things you can do to really change up how everything feels.

Adjust the hip tilt. Tilt the hips forward or backwards to change exactly where the Top’s shaft is hitting. This can better bring your p-spot into the action.

Grab your partner. Being unable to see your lover can make this sex position feel a little less intimate. If you’re craving some of that intimacy, put your hands to good use. Cuddle and kiss the arm that’s under your head or reach backwards, gripping the top’s hip to “pull” them into you.

Speak up. Unlike many sex positions, the top can’t see your face in this position. If something isn’t as stellar as you’d like, make sure to speak up. Sometimes, a small adjustment in angle can make a big difference in how well this hones into your most pleasurable spots.

Why Side Sex Is a Go-To

The side sex position is one of those rare moves that’s both easy and seriously hot, especially when you want something that feels intimate without turning sex into a cardio workout. If you keep lube close, play with your angles, and actually say what you want (deeper, slower, more tilt, less thrust), it can turn into a long, lazy session that still hits the right spots. And if you ever get bored? That’s what the variations are for: small tweaks, totally different sensations.