In the Gay Universe there are no absolutes. Opposites attract, fit likes fit, boyfriend twins, sugar daddies with 20 somethings, bear on bear, bear eats twinkie. So when it came to Graham Norton's comments to The Mail on Sunday's TV Week, I had to think, in a LGBT community that sees all kinds of pairings, is he right?
Graham Norton has said the reason he is still single is because men his own age only want to date younger men.
The 52-year-old chat show king returned to our screens (its 18th season) on Friday night with BBC's The Graham Norton Show, but said in spite of his professional success, he feels he let himself down personally at times.
The Cork native has enjoyed little romantic success over the years and was recently linked to Andrew Smith before their split earlier this year.
And while he said he's keen to meet someone his own age, it can be difficult.
"Well, I'm 52 and I'm single and on some level, I feel like I've failed because by the time you're my age, you really should be settled," he told The Mail on Sunday's TV Week.
"But then I look at the relationships people around me have and I find myself asking, 'Really? That doesn't look like winning to me'. I've reached the point that when people ask, 'Are you single at the moment?', I say, 'Come on, you can drop the at the moment'. I'm single forever.
"That's the weird thing. Gay men my age don't want to date someone their age." – independent.ie
To read more from the interview, head over to independent.ie.
Do you agree with Graham Norton? Do men 50+ not want to date 50+ men?
It’s not only that , it seems
It's not only that , it seems to me that men of our age who have dated and lost don't want to date at all. Dating is a bizarre thing. I don't get it. It's meet, screw, talk about dating and then disappear. I tried over and over to make a connection and keep it going and then lost or never heard from the guy again. I did end up finding a guy . He is younger than me but he wanted to date. He wants a relationship and wants to be with someone who loves him equally. I could not find that within my own age group.
It’s unfortunately been my
It's unfortunately been my truth….im 31, and no guys my age even take a second glance at me…they all go for older men. I attract older guys like crazy though, but I would never date too much of an older guy for my own pragmatic reasons….it's so frustrating =/
I seen him out quite a few
I seen him out quite a few times and he gets so drunk and always after young guys. So this doesn't make sense. Just saying
I’m 45 and all I seem to
I’m 45 and all I seem to attract are guys in their 20s. I’m fine having sex with someone in their 20s but I’d never date someone that young. I’m looking for someone around my age but all they want are guys in their 20s and 30s. I recently asked a guy out and he flat out told me he doesn’t date guys over 40 and he is 51 years old! I guess I’m lucky to have a close group of friends to grow older with because the chances of finding a man my age who wants to date a guy his own age appear to be slim.
I think maybe Graham is at
I think maybe Graham is at the very special stage all mature men go through but not all men grow out of..
Well I would marry Graham
Well I would marry Graham Norton in a second! I'm 51 and have always fancied him! Ps I love his beard! xxx
I’m 69 and have been with my
I'm 69 and have been with my partner 45 years as of September 26th, 2015. He is 72. Life has been very good to the both of us. We engaged this partnership with our eyes wide open. As time went on we realized our lives and our partnership of 45 years is what we made of them. No one else can make you happy, but if your both happy, it works very well. Have a perfect day gentlemen.
With one exception, I’ve only
With one exception, I've only dated older than me. Not necessarily by design, it just worked out that way. That said, I'd really like to try someone my own age. Graham, I'm 51…give me a call 😉
I’am 37 and my partner
I'am 37 and my partner husband is 49. I think get interested in someone who has the same interests as you first. The bedroom chemistry will work itself out later if u get to know each other first
I suppose I’m somewhat ageist
I suppose I'm somewhat ageist. If you weren't toddling around when I was in college or I wasn't toddling around when you were I really don't think you qualify. Preference wise I prefer someone older 'cuz I want to be the young(er) one in a relationship. Graham has a year on me so I'm available if he's up for someone who really doesn't drink.
My partner is the same age as
My partner is the same age as me 38, and we're very happy. Is previously mostly gone for older men but the older you get the less if them there are.
Forever,
Forever,
I'm 59 [to gay men, that SOUNDS ANCIENT and decrepit]…..and have a successful professional career. To many men, it appears to be intimidating and off-putting. ….The age and the career! I can only say that being actively engaged in having a career, and a successful life, and yes, boyfriends/partners along the way, and desiring nothing to do with the drug, circuit scene seems to exclude some, if not many, of us. so many guys my age want guys 5-15+ years younger than they are themselves. For me, there's just too much 'life-lived-experience-factor" missing when the age difference is > about 10 years. Perhaps theirs is some innate desire to remain forever young. Some grown-ass men are just flaky! Some are sociopaths. Some lie. many cheat. At the end of the day, the one factor that seems missing or exceedingly well hidden in gay culture is that of integrity. BE who you say you are. No one is perfect….
Thats true but there are men
Thats true but there are men who want to to date their own age. I am 50 in December this year and I would prefer to be in a relationship with someone my own age because the relationship is going to be strong. I certainly wouldn't be in a relationship with a guy of 22 + because they don't have the experience and most them do sleep around and cheat.
So Graham if your interested in me then get in touch or any other guy in fact
I think the man is correct. I
I think the man is correct. I am a successful man of 53 living in Atlanta. I am not sure he is correct about ageism. I meet guys my age, younger, older, etc. the problem isn't really age, it's whether or not you want to devote time to building a relationship with your baggage and his? Affluence, and busy career, gym, travel, and other degrees of freedom in a mid life successful career result in more autonomy for guys our age. Many guys our age are around because we survived the scourge of AIDS. For some we are living out our adolescence while its a lot safer than in 1985! I can't help but think our group of men in the community are still scarred from the AIDS CRISIS, and the awful discrimination of the 80s and 90s.for
I am 54 and take good care of
I am 54 and take good care of myself. Eight years ago I left my home of 22 years – NYC – and moved to a beautiful Latin American country where (for the first time) I found myself in a Gay Community quite 'age-blind' and what a 'lucky liberation' that turned out to be/for me! Although I have never been particularly attracted to younger men, today I find myself in a committed and very loving relationship (4 years) with someone much younger than me. I am SO grateful – because just as I was beginning to turn into a 'grumpy old man' I am now reminded daily by my younger partner that every day is filled with love & possibility!
Well, look at all your
Well, look at all your straight male friends who are divorced. They're going after the young stuff also. This is not a gay thing; it's a GUY thing!
Who the F**K is Andrew Smith?
Who the F**K is Andrew Smith? Why should it be news who anyone dates?
I’m soon to be 53 and it is
I'm soon to be 53 and it is very difficult to get a date! I find it frustrating and guys who do not want to take the word DATE, for what it means. I have never seen so many guys my age lie, cheat and no future of commitment.
I do not do that thing they call daddy. In fact, I hate that term very much! It seems more and more us older men are being kicked to curb.
I’m 45 and I want to date my
I'm 45 and I want to date my age but it's more younger guys that are into me. I get a lot of late 20y olds after me…it's annoying, I've never been in a relationship with a guy less than 10 years younger and I'm sick of it but that's all I get! Older guys are just not into me and I really want an older guy! Really!!
I am single and in my fifties
I am single and in my fifties, and in my dreams I would love to date a much younger man. Late 20's, early 30's is young enough to be young but old enough to be mature and would be perfect. It's probably not going to happen. Now I do have friends in that age group, and they feel I am a good catch for someone closer to my age. They also know I have been rejected by one of my contemporaries who claimed I'm not perfect, but my younger friends claim he should be looking in a mirror before he criticizes me or anyone else. It's easier to see the few extra pounds in a contemporary than it is in ourselves. This person also thinks that every young person who pays attention to him is flirting. To me, I think they are just being nice.
What I am discovering is that people in my own age bracket who like me find themselves single, in my case due to death, are more relationship oriented and more open to dating someone their age. Those who played the field a bit too much or did not invest in long term relationships, perhaps have money and success, can find it difficult. I know what makes a relationship work, and I want someone who knows it too, and chances are that person will probably have to be in his 40's. I won't find him in bars, but they do shop in supermarkets, attend concerts, walk their dogs, and have common friends.
I have to be honest, ever
I have to be honest, ever since I was a teenager, I've ALWAYS been attracted to older men. My ex was 38 when I met him, and I had just turned 18. I think older men have so much more to offer, especially when it comes to experience, whether that be in life or in the bedroom. I'm 35 and single now, and if I were to get into a relationship, I would go for someone older but a little closer to my age. I do worry that as I get older, it will be harder for me to find someone because the older men will want younger men than I. I just can't imagine myself dating someone younger. That's just not for me.
Graham is right, since I
Graham is right, since I turned fifty I don't seem to relate to people my own age. I am not looking for a twenty year old, but I also don't want to be someone's caretaker!
If your a top come to Atlanta
If your a top come to Atlanta GA USA. Bottom capital of the Milky Way.
PS I love the Beard
Older men don’t drive sports
Older men don't drive sports cars because they are having mid-life crises. Twenty year olds want to own the sports cars too; they just can't afford them. Gay men generally are not attracted to older men. As proof, try to find a gay porn magazine filled with images of old men That becomes a dilemma when you're older and looking for love. The older guys are not attractive, and the younger ones aren't attracted.I'm of his generation. I still have a great body and an attractive face. I get chased by women constantly. I can't find an older guy that is interested in me, or that I find interesting.Being old and lonely is part of the package deal, I guess, for our generation.
I am 53 , and i’m looking for
I am 53 , and i'm looking for someone my age a just a little older , i do believe i'm not in the average group of those who want or much older with money or younger for the physique …. 😉
I meant to say, also, with
I meant to say, also, with all due respect…I do not know who you are, but you are attractive and I would be willing to meet you for a drink anytime. Problem is, I live in Arizona USA.
Yes, they do but it’s
Yes, they do but it’s depending on there energy more so than the age. Don’t give up!
Yes I agree. Â It seems the
Yes I agree. It seems the older a man gets, the more his attraction for a much-younger man. It is not unlike the hetero world…older guys want younger 'trophy' wives, etc. I certainly am not an expert in this by any means. I was married to a woman for 45 years before I made the decision to live authentically as a gay man. It is a lonely world in some ways, but I can't say I will ever want to live 24-7 with another person! But, dating…is a challenge.