Is It Ever Too Soon To Add A Third?

Is It Ever Too Soon To Add A Third?


Is Monogamy Completely Dead?

Ahh, another late-night post for #InstinctAfterDark. This one is certainly not about a friend or even someone who I’ve met by chance. This is my own story and a serious question I’ve found myself in over the last few weeks.


Is there ever a right time to add a third?


Upon discussion with my most recent knight-in-shining-armor, he mentions that he wants a third to join our loveable duo for a night. At first, I was into it. I know, I gave permission but feel me out for a second!

The conversation happened early on a Sunday morning when the hangover is hitting hard. Life never necessarily feels real when you’re hungover, which is essentially the best time for me to write creatively. Maybe I was in a different state of reality upon first agreeing to having a third involved in with this man who I’d genuinely like to pursue a relationship with.


Now, I battle with mixed emotions. Am I not enough for him? In the event we involved a third once, would I ever be enough for him?

Yes, I’ve engaged in a threesome before. I have been to college and you know, lived a little. I am a millennial after all. Yet, I don’t know if at this stage in my mid-20s, seeking a long-term relationship, that I could consider still falling in love with someone who has locked bedroom eyes with another in the same bed as me! But, then I think: Am I being a prude? I just can’t help but feel once a threesome happens…a relationship simply won’t.

However, what if a threesome could unite us more? As far as I’m concerned, we haven’t been having any issues inside or outside of the bedroom. What if our experience with a third is so absurd that we laugh about it hysterically afterwards? Or use it for future foreplay during dirty talk? A little kink never hurt anybody. Perhaps if we make a set of rules beforehand?


Upon dating, even casually, should monogamy be discussed right off the bat? Should we be flagging this in our stats on Grindr!?

Has a threesome ever hurt or helped your impending relationship?


Unrelated Image via Instagram

What do you think?