Whenever an LGBTQ+ person shares or talks about their personal journey, the fight they had to become themselves, what they have been through or what they are currently going through, there’s a chance that this will help someone else realize that they are not alone in their struggle, someone else is going through the same thing, someone made it through a similar challenge.
Kudos to David Archuleta for his being very open about his personal battles and coming to terms with his sexuality. And like us, as he sorts through his past trials and tribulations, he’s finding more things to talk about. Who hasn’t personally realized that life did suck and it got better, and when it got better, we were able to pause and reflect on what the heck we put ourselves through and what others have put us through.
By now, we all know that Former American Idol contestant David Archuleta was raised in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Many of us preach that we knew he was gay from the first moment we saw him, but the Mormon singer officially came out last summer (2021).
He’s been opening up quite a bit and we’ve been there for it. Sharing some of his personal revelations in previous posts like:
During the last performance of his The More the Merrier Christmas Tour in Chandler, Arizona, the singer shared another tearful message. He started off questioning his Christmas Spirit and was it up to a level that would carry him through the season and the concert tour.
What David Shared –
As his share session went on, we wondered, would this interlude lead to people walking out of his concert like they did in Delta, Utah when he opened up about his sexuality and his faith crisis?
“I was afraid of who I was, and how I was. I thought I needed to change that to be acceptable and be okay.”
Archuleta was speaking again about his struggle with faith and prayer during this coming out process. The song he was preparing to sing was My Little Prayer, a call for God to change him, to remove the broken part of him so he could thrive and be alive and be happy in the church and life, a call and prayer that David had been making since age 12.
“I thought with due diligence and if I have enough faith he’ll answer my prayers and be able to change me to that I’m acceptable. I would look at myself and I wasn’t the same as everyone else and the way that I was told I should be.”
All of that pressure from inside, from the church, coming close to trying to live how others wanted him to, and to almost get married three different times to women.
“I was just getting terrified because […] I knew that I wasn’t able to desire them in the way that they deserved to be and in the way that they wanted to be.”
And of course there was self blame. We’ve all been there. We’ve all thought we must have done something wrong. And we do think that we are hurting others. And maybe we should do something to solve all of this hurt, to remove the hurt, suicide, which he mentions at the 5 minute mark.
“I just thought I must not be good enough, maybe God cursed me. I was thinking like, you know I don’t want to be here and be bad, so maybe it’s better that I’m not here.”
As a person of faith, David did try to pray those “incorrect” feelings away. And as a faithful person, he feels he received an answer which allowed him to stop the self hate which he talks about at the 6 minute mark.
He livened up the chat in a humorous way when he said that he now knows what a crush is and how it is supposed to feel … at the age of 31 finally.
As mentioned, we’ve covered David and him sharing his journey, his thoughts, and his personal discovery. We think positive stories like his are great to share and are needed to be heard.
We’ve had some readers say, “Oh no, not him again!” To those individuals, I say, “Bless Your Heart” and maybe we should respond to those people with just that. Bless your heart that you have it all figured out, bless your heart that sharing someone else’s story puts you out. Bless your heart that you found the time to be negative when someone is trying to share something positive, something that may help someone else discover who they are, deal with some of those challenges, and choose life and living and happiness over that other awful option.
As with any story we share that discusses suicide, we share The Trevor Project contact information.
Thank you again David for your words, your sharing, and your heart. And for that song he was about to sing just before he broke out in his moving monologue, here is My Little Prayer.