Do You Need To Flaunt Sex To Be Sexy?
I’ve worked in the Digital world for quite some time now. Specifically, the LGBTQ Digital world, which is rather different from our straight allies. If you want to fight me on this: There is a separate Buzzfeed aimed towards an LGBTQ audience. I rest my case.
For the last year, I’ve visited nearly every LGBTQ blog in existence on a daily basis. Hi Queerty! Hi WoWReport! Hi GayTimes! While these websites have individual voices, we share one common trend. Our audiences are in love with photographs of shirtless men, promiscuity, and nude slip ups. Believe in me; I see the numbers. A thoughtful, academic article can get seven views, while an Instagram celebrity’s bare butt receives a number I can’t even properly say. Sex may not necessarily sell, but it absolutely gets a click. It’s easy to witness on Instagram that the less clothing you have, the more followers and likes you attract.
Genuinely, I am not slut shaming or blasting anyone who is posting their nude bodies on social media! I am no innocent angel. I’ve been known to Thot and Bop myself! You only live once and if you got it, flaunt it! Do whatever the hell you want with it! Every- body is beautiful and an art form in itself. I am, however, giving slight side eye to those who do it for notoriety and followers on social media. Those who strive to be half nude for viral fame.
The statistics got me thinking. Why are there so many beautiful, modest men that don’t get promoted on our most popular websites? As a community, are we that obsessed with sex? I’m here to change that!
Recently, I had wonderful opportunity to chat with four, gay men who are not posting their bodies on social media. I want to show you them while making a statement: You don’t have to bait your body to be wanted, important, or sexy!
Join me in getting to know these four, sexy men who you won’t find posting eggplant emojis in front of their bulges.
Scott Neasham, 55, Realtor, Iowa
You can catch Scott Neasham renovating homes and helping you find the best place to live. Formerly, the owner of Chicago Male in Chicago, Illinois, Neasham currently resides in Iowa living his fullest life. My fingers may or may not have been swelling while chatting with Neasham. Not only is he gorgeous, but he gives you the time of day to make you feel more special than your ex ever has!
On social media flaunters:
“I think there’s an age, 30ish, where there’s only rare exceptions where guys should flaunt their bodies [on social media]. I do think I look okay, but I don’t think of myself as sexy at all. Twenty years ago, maybe!”
On dating in 2017:
“There was a point after dating some really great guys and trying and nothing ever worked out. I decided to be happy with myself, live my life not basing it off of a relationship. Which was hard to do.”
Arny Lugh, 25, Retail Manager, Texas
Not only do you fall in love with Arny Lugh because of his dreamy eyes and perfect facial hair, but you’ve also got to give it up for someone who has a sense of fashion! Speaking with Lugh makes you want to give him all of the chicken nuggets he desires while you’re cuddled in his arms. He’s adorable, flirty, and a Texan! What's not to love?!
On nudity via social media:
“I don't feel the need to [show my body on social media]. I want people to get to know ME for who I am and explore my journey as I get older, not for my looks or body parts. Personality over looks. I understand some [flaunt their body] for Art purposes and others for attention and you can definitely spot the difference. To each their own. Some people though, are just over the top though. Is it really necessary?”
On using social media to date:
“Social [media] if anything has made it harder for me to connect with someone. Profiles can be misleading and sometimes a flat out lie. Not to mention I feel like it's a constant battle trying to retain the attention of the guy you're interested in. [There’s] too many options and they can't seem to make up their mind.”
Martin Foster, 28, Bartender, Illinois
The moment you fall in love with Martin Foster is the minute he says hello to you. I’m seriously talking about even on social media. His charm, and sex appeal, exudes through the keyboard. He shows you his true self and still leaves you eager for more. I’d tell you all what I truly think of Foster, but I’m deathly afraid someone in my family will read this… I’d like to look everyone in the eye during the holidays.
On flaunting sex on social media:
“I used to show my body on social media all the time. Back when it was one of my only outlets seeing and talking to other gay men. It was for that attention, but the older I got [my social media] morphed into my day to day personality outside of my body. I'll never have anything negative say to say about men with no clothes on [Laughs]. Social media is now a full-fledged business and if someone is making money off their appearance, more power to them.”
On being sexy on social media:
“I have a lot of confidence in my physical appearance. However, I think more of me goes into my 'sexiness' than that. Low key, my first boyfriend and I met through social media. I think it can be very successful, but you have to know what people's relationship intentions are.”
Graham Sullivan, 24, Retail Private Yacht Charter Broker, British Columbia
What a dream boat! Okay, that was a silly pun due to Graham Sullivan’s Rockstar occupation. With Sullivan, the conversation never seems to end. You don’t just have a conversation, you connect with him. If you peek into his life, you’ll vicariously live his adventures. It’s safe to say, I’d all go to the ends of the world with him! Who wouldn't?!
On social media nudity:
“I choose to not show my body on social media as I find the platforms extremely public. I believe that our body doesn’t emulate who we actually are as citizens of the World. I believe social media is meant to be used as an expressional stage where we can showcase what our best qualities are as human beings What we love to spend our free time doing, what we have chosen as a profession, and the experiences we choose to take part in. I have chosen social media as a platform to bring my friends and others along for the wild adventures and travels of the 123 countries I have been fortunate enough to see. Through those travels I've been able to gain the experience to become a full international Yacht Broker.”
On finding love through social media:
“I am single and focusing on my professional life rather than personal. I just recently got out of a 2 year relationship that exposed a lot of personal growth I need to achieve within myself. My closest friends always tell me that when I’m not focusing on finding Mr. Right, he will show up in my life exactly when he is meant too! Being single has its perks – especially when you need to love yourself before you can share love with another. I just recently got out of a 2 year relationship with a man that I connected with through Instagram! We “liked” each other’s posts in synchronized fashion, which was intriguing to me. When I told my friends and family that I was going to New York City to meet a man that I had connected with through Instagram they were shocked! The 21st century technology has become so advanced that I believe it is the wave of the future! This goes back to where your social media presence is extremely important for several aspects of our lives.”
That’s it! I’ve brought these wonderful gentlemen to the forefront! Their social media handles are hyperlinked on their names! Feel free to flutter and leave heart-eyed emojis over everything! Have the best weekend, kittens! Follow your Instinct!
Editor's Note 1: I have coined the term Thot and Bop.
Editor's Note 2: Quotes have been changed for clarity.
He’ll yes you can be sexy
He'll yes you can be sexy without going naked it's a nice surprise by that point your attracted and like the guy the rest is a bonus.
Graham Sullivan is sooooooooo
Graham Sullivan is sooooooooo hot!!