A couple of the other gay blog spheres out there have been generating lists of stars that they say "should" and "need to" come out this year. To that I say STFU! and that doesn't mean 'shut the front door'.
Why is is so gosh darn important for stars to be out? Some say it's so they can be great role models and show LGBT youth that there are others like them out there. Well, I'm sorry. If you don't know that there are gay people out there and you haven't heard of the "It Gets Better" campaign by now, you need to plug into reality as well as social media a little more. With individuals like Ellen, Tim Cook, Elton, NPH and well soooo many more, why are we being such a greedy community and trying to up our numbers? It's not a competition and these are people's personal lives we are talking about. If they don't want to come out, then that should be fine with the rest of us.
About 4 or 5 years ago, I was out in Los Angeles for a friend's wedding and while there, I frequented a couple of the fine gay establishments southern California had to offer. I vividly recall seeing Charlie Carver at one of the gay hot spots and no, he wasn't there drinking straight beer or supporting a gay friend. He was there because it was a gay bar and he was gay. He as very comfortable in his surroundings and himself. I am sure there have been many more stars sightings "out" that aren't out and we let them be. Why? Because it is their lives and we need to let them live their lives as they see fit. I and I am sure others could have outed Charlie years ago, but why? I had and still have a huge crush on the lad. Maybe I should have threatened to out him publicly or something like others in our community do. Dragging Charlie through the tabloids would have helped someone out there be more secure about their sexuality, right?
There are stars that are gay and will eventually decide on when they will come out and there are others that are basically already out, but don't feel like writing it in stone next to their star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Colton Haynes keeps coming up, another hottie I wouldn't mind getting to know better. Well before Teen Wolf we all knew he was gay or are at least 99.9% sure he was. It was accepted by most out there that could add 2 and 1 and get a queer $3 bill. His nonchalant-ness when a fan posted, "When I found out Colton Haynes had a secret gay past, I got so excited even though I know it makes absolutely no difference in my life" was actually refreshing and very welcomed. Haynes' Tublr response to the post? "Was it a secret? Let’s all just enjoy life & have no regrets :)” Exactly!
Another star people constantly are prodding with sticks to come out of the closet is Queen Latifah. Once again, there is no secret there. Is she only out and proud if she is OUT IN YOUR FACE and LOUD AND PROUD?
I'm also tired of hearing, "But they're all stars and they gave up their privacy when they became stars." and "It's the price they pay for being famous." These are great excuses for you to share information that may alter someone's social and professional life forever. Great job!
As far as I am concerned, individuals that do not violently speak against our community are fine individuals and should not be hunted down. In these lists written by other LGBT media, the "gay hunt" continues AGAINST many well known citizens like Aaron Rodgers and Will and Jada Pinkett Smith. I use the word against, because this is a negative activity. Just let people live. When and if they are ever ready and if they truly are LGBT, then they will choose the best way to inform 330 million Americans and the rest of the world about what goes on in their bedroom.
To those that desire to out people as LGBT, to put a spotlight onto what stars choose to do in their beds, I say "Cut The Crap." Better yet, if you are tormenting these stars with your outing ways, instead of asking red carpet goers who are you wearing, why aren't you asking Jennifer Lawrence if she likes anal or Dame Judy Dench if she is a fan of threesomes. Why not learn about everyone's bedroom preferences. I am sure we would all like to know if Daniel Craig is submissive to his wife in bed. If sex sells so much, go after the straight majority of the population. There are more of them and more stories to share.
So are we being hypocritical? Is Instinct calling for stars to come out? I don't recall us doing such a thing. I would like to think that we are here celebrating those that have decided to come out. Charlie Carver – congrats for doing what you feel you needed to do to be the whole you, and I'd love to buy you a drink some day. Tom Daley, we would have loved you until forever, even if that speedo-clad body of yours wasn't gay. Kristian Nairn, even if you only have one word in your character's vocabulary, it is nice knowing you are family.
Do you think gay stars have a responsibility to come out?