Rugby Knickers: For Athletic Performance (and Our Pleasure)

Petition incoming: To whoever is in charge of rugby uniforms (hello, governing body of tight shorts and serious glutes), we respectfully—and thirstily—request that you consider making those delightful little training knickers the official on-field attire. Forever. Please and thank you.

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If you’ve been online recently, you’ve probably been blessed with that viral video of rugby players running, sliding, tackling, and catching balls (yes, balls) in nothing but their gloriously snug, brightly colored knickers. And if you haven’t seen it? Stop reading. Go find it. Then come back here, flushed and grateful.

@katies_got_cakes

Replying to @whereisnicolerenee definitely need to let @Noodle Bagz that people are wanting more of their halftime show and this is why they should come see @San Diego Legion #noodlebags #rugbyboys #sandiego #firsttime #7v7 #sdlegion #rugby #bigboyseason #scrum

♬ big boy sza – normusreedus

RELATED: Why Rugby Is a Full-Body Blessing That Keeps On Giving

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@katies_got_cakes

And for those who are also learning about rugby just like I am.. this is a very normal celebration after scoring a Try, which is worth five points. #sdlegion #7v7 #firsttime #sandiego #rugbyboys #noodlebags @Noodle Bagz @San Diego Legion

♬ original sound – rzqadn – rzqadn

Rugby players have always had a certain… je ne sais thigh. They’re the perfect cocktail of brute strength, athletic grace, and unintentional thirst traps. But there’s something about these itty bitty training shorts—emphasis on shorts—that takes the spectacle from competitive to compelling. The fabric clings just right, showing off sculpted quads, muscular glutes, and calves that could probably crush melons. And let’s not forget the obvious perk: less fabric = more freedom. (For them and for our imaginations.)

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Now, the internet, as it always does, has reacted accordingly. The comment section is absolute gold:

  • “Finally a sport I can enjoy!”

  • “I’d go to every game.”

  • “Where do I purchase season tickets?”

  • “I would watch sports everyday if they wore uniforms like these.”

  • “Makes more sense… they need less fabric in their way for better range of motion… or whatever.”

@katies_got_cakes

First Rugby game… I think I’m a fan #rugby #noodlebags #spectacular #rugbyboys #sandiego #firsttime #7v7 #sdlegion @Noodle Bagz

♬ original sound – Cartiiier Chery

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Honestly? The people have spoken.

There’s something endearing about the sheer chaos and joy of it all. Rugby is already a sport where skinship is practically a requirement—whether it’s lifting your teammates sky-high during lineouts or diving into a human pile for the ball, there’s no avoiding full-contact intimacy. And when you add snug shorts and bouncing biceps into the mix? It’s less “rugby match,” more “homoerotic fever dream.” We’re not mad about it.

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Let’s be real: we’re not trying to objectify anyone (ok, maybe a tiny bit). We’re just here trying to boost sports appreciation across the globe! That’s our story, and we’re sticking to it.

So here’s our humble suggestion: make the knickers permanent. Not only would stadiums be sold out, but you’d be sparking a whole new generation of fans—many of whom have never willingly watched a sport in their life. Representation matters… especially when it comes in the form of strong thighs and cheeky shorts.

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