The British have given us excellent tea, questionable weather and, apparently, two very different reasons to forget what we were doing. Brett Goldstein has a towel. Harry Styles has tattoos. Both have suspiciously little interest in keeping their shirts involved.
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So the real question is not whether we like our Brits. Please. The question is: hairy, smooth or tattooed?
Brett Goldstein Has Entered His Towel Era
Brett Goldstein is feeling himself, and honestly, we understand the enthusiasm.
The Ted Lasso star has already shown plenty of skin in projects including All of You, Drifters and Ted Lasso, but his latest Netflix rom-com Office Romance with Jennifer Lopez is taking his heartthrob credentials to a dangerous new level.
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The movie gives Goldstein and Lopez plenty of steamy moments, including one particularly spicy scene in which the two get into some sexy fun in Lopez’s office while Goldstein is wearing next to nothing.
Now Goldstein is stripping things back even further for a new Men’s Health UK spread, posing poolside in little more than a towel. And let’s be honest: a towel has never looked so much like a threat. Goldstein revealed that he started taking his fitness more seriously once it was confirmed he would play Lopez’s love interest.
“I just kind of stayed working out, because it really did help my head. Being topless in stuff certainly makes you go, ‘Yeah, I really need to work out,'” he says.
That may be the most effective gym motivation we’ve heard yet. Forget personal goals. Just imagine being told your next role requires you to stand around shirtless opposite Jennifer Lopez.
Suddenly, leg day sounds urgent. Office Romance is streaming now on Netflix.
Harry Styles Has Declared War on Shirts
Then there’s Harry Styles, who appears to have reached the conclusion that shirts are best treated as an optional accessory.
Styles covers the September issue of W magazine with his abs and tattoos front and center, photographed by David Sims in a custom Miu Miu leather jacket worn open and Calvin Klein Collection underwear featuring “Disco” on the waistband — a nod to his fourth studio album, Kiss All the Time. Disco, Occasionally.
The “shirt optional” theme continues throughout the shoot, with longtime collaborator Harry Lambert styling Styles in a Chanel chainmail jacket over jeans and a Dior suit worn with only a cross pendant against his chest.
Because apparently if you are going to wear a shirt, you should at least make everyone question whether it counts.
Styles also appears in leather pants with a bow-adorned scoop-neck top, a Saint Laurent by Anthony Vaccarello custom sparkly top with furry cuffs, and tailored suits from Hermès and Burberry. It is fashion, technically. It is also a prolonged exercise in making people stare.
So… Which British Flavor Are We Choosing?
Goldstein is serving rugged. Styles is serving inked-up pop star. One has a towel doing the absolute bare minimum. The other has couture doing everything possible to distract us from the fact that there is still plenty of skin on display.
Goldstein says topless roles gave him extra motivation to work out. Styles seems to have taken the opposite approach and decided that if his shirt is going to exist, it should barely participate. And really, why choose?
Give us the hairy British heartthrob. Give us the tattooed pop star. Give us the man who looks like he just left the pool and the man who looks like he just left a fashion editor’s very expensive fever dream.
We support a diverse British ecosystem. Tea for the soul. Abs for the community.