Picture it: The Bronx, 2020 (insert Sophia Petrillo voice here). You and your husband find yourselves both diagnosed with COVID. It sucks, like really sucks, but guess what? The love you have, which has already been there for years, shines so brightly during this time where you both recover and resume your wonderful lives together.
That’s the case for Steve and Dan, the latest to be featured in Instinct Magazine’s ongoing Couple Series. The beautiful duo survived and eventually thrived after their COVID nightmare where things remain peachy keen with them as their relationship continues.
Read more about them below where they also talk about the importance of finding someone who “matches your crazy”.
How did you two initially meet and was it love at first sight?
Steve: Are we giving the straight people version?
Dan: Let’s give the tea. We met on squirt.org!
Steve: It’s a place for adult adventures. It predates the current trending apps
Dan: His profile pic was his p**is and I liked it. So it was lust at first sight!
What is your favorite thing to love about each other?
Steve: He has a heart of gold, and truly, uncynically cares for everyone. He is just pure light.
Dan: I love his p**is! LOL all jokes aside, he’s adventurous, sweet, caring and brings out the best in me.
Steve: And when someone matches your crazy and really lets you be yourself, you have to put a ring on it.
Are you monogamous or in an open relationship? How do you make either work?
Dan: We are in an open relationship, but it’s not the first thing on our agenda. It’s more of a back burner type of thing. We aren’t on the hunt but if it happens to happen.
Steve: That’s a minefield. Everyone, including our friends, range from support to outrage at the concept. I get that it’s not for everyone and for those couples in open relationships, no two are ever the same, so I wouldn’t recommend or dissuade anyone about getting into one. I can only say what has worked for us. Communication and intent are everything. Making sure your partner is priority is bedrock. And the rest is just human nature
What has COVID been like for the two of you? Has it brought you closer together?
Steve: I call it a win that we have now spent so much extra time with each other and still like each other even more. We know each other enough to know when the other needs a bit more space or a bit more attention and that’s been really important. Once you survive a pandemic together, you really feel like you can take on any challenge.
Dan: Also supporting each other while protecting our families. We both have vulnerable family members and do what we can to shield them from threats and risk. It’s a lot, so the support is needed. We both caught it early last year, recovered and felt confident going out, doing our families groceries and errands having felt the worst part be behind us.
Has the topic of adopting or having kids via surrogate ever come up?
Dan: We’ve never really discussed it, it’s been like a passing conversation, but I don’t think we’re ready for that type of responsibility yet.
Steve: Next question.
What is the best advice you would give to anyone who is looking for love out there but hasn’t found it?
Steve: I hate to sound so trite but, stop trying so hard. When you’re so hellbent on searching for a partner, you end up looking desperate and pushing potentials away. It’s a cliché to say “it will happen when you’re not expecting it” but honestly that’s been my experience with all my relationships. I don’t know if it’s a “vibe you’re giving out” thing but if you’re not man-thirsty and just living your life and enjoying yourself, you tend to be more attractive as a mate.
Dan: I’ve felt like “looking” for love puts too much pressure on yourself or a potential significant other. Just chill and let things happen organically. You’ll know when butterflies tickle your stomach like it did for me when Steve asked me out.